Fire!We were all in my aunt's kitchen at the back of her huge rambling Victorian house. I was only small and had wandered off to go to the loo, but given up after finding the hall full of smoke. "That was quick," my mum said after a few minutes. "Yes - it's all smoky," I replied.
I've never seen adults move so fast.
So, like my cousin who'd managed to set fire to the roof, tell us your fire stories.
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chthonic, Thu 3 Nov 2005, 9:11)
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I rememberthe day the ice-cream van caught fire. The situation looked truly grim till all the local kids rallied round and chucked hot tea on the blaze, all the while grooving away to the strains of Coolio faintly audible from their ever-present stereo headphones. Their heroic actions saved the hour, and within a matter of weeks the ice-cream van was back to its normal self, tootling around the neighbourhood and playing its tinny travesties of the classics as if nothing had happened at all.
All went well until several years later, when a plague of fire-babies came to terrorise the neighbourhood; these horrendous beasts were lightning-fast little buggers that grew bigger anytime they heard Coolio songs, and whose babylike screams confused mothers who were otherwise repelled by their slowly-burning appearances. The fire-babies were eventually put out by Army helicopters spraying industrial-grade flame retardants over everything; despite their remedial properties, they were an absolute bugger to get out of the carpet, and nothing ever grew in our garden again. All this could have been avoided if those pesky kids hadn't wanked into their tea before using it to put out the blazing ice-cream van!
However, at the time I was oblivious to all this - I was busy losing my virginity to the princess of my last B3ta QOTW story....
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The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 6 Nov 2005, 22:05,
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