Wedding Fire
My Aunt and Uncle decided to get married. Me and my brother being the cutest of of all the kids, were named as page boys. At 11 years old I was not too happy about it. My brother aged 9 was enjoying the attention but when the bride and groom prepared too depart fro their honeymoon my brother was ejected from the limelight. He had a cunning plan though. Checking the coast was clear, he grabbed the souvenir matches from a table and went outside to genie the whole box. The miniscule flame did not warrant much attention. He needed to get magnify his inferno, and fast. With a quick peek he found some old leaves, good work bro i thought. Now the flames are 4ft high but this is still not enough for even a quick peek from anyone resembling a grown up. But all is not lost, my cunning brother has seen enough MacGuyver to know how to make yourself better off from any given situation. He throws on the flames an old dried up wooden fence. The flames follow his command, up the fence to the dried ivy along the metal fence. Now we are cooking with gas! The flames traverse the back garden at incredible speed ultimately reaching their desired target, the coup de gras, the pinnacle of his plan. My genius brother knew that once the flames reached the back corner of the garden it would combust the small petrol cannister, in turn exploding the old rusty oil barrel. The resulting force would destroy one side of the shed, exposing the gas cannisters. Once the flames reached the sawdust floor it was a matter of time. Too anyone bar the consumate professional, the timing is way too hard to judge. My brother, belonging to the upper echelons of the Arsonists Serenade Squad, was one of the best at perfect timing. Just as the first gas cannister exploded, shooting across the garden, the groom come rushing around the corner with a bucket of water. It was joyful to watch such a perfectionist at work. The missile connected with his left parietal bone causing blunt force trauma. The surrounding area seemed to fall silent, everyone looking left in unison with my brother simply standing there holding the first match he had picked up that day, blackened and crooked, embodying everything to do with the dangers of fire, but to him, it was a magic wand.
His family blamed my brother for the incident, i do not know why, he was just being a good son and listening to his loving grandmother and the priest, it was after all her who said he was not good enough for her and she would be off without him, but she would not leave him...
well till death do they part.
Little did they know my brother was a genius in fire related crime and no one would ruin his day in his special black suit with bow tie.
The funeral was a week later. All went well.

Magic
( MagicallyInept Bored Sig., Mon 7 Nov 2005, 12:46, Reply)