Hide the turd
A favourite story of one my ex housemates. Its one of those "friend of a friend" ones, but I believe it to be true.

A friend of my housemate was at a fairly uneventful party once, and everyone was getting pretty drunk. At a particularly dull point in the night, someone suggested that they play "Hide the Turd" In which one person takes a shit, and somehow (I'm not sure how) transports it into a hiding place somewhere in the house, and the other people have to try and find it. There are some lovely people around. So this person has a turd, hides it somewhere in the house, and the others start looking all over for it. But they can't find it anywhere, and eventually give up.

The party eventually ends, turd still hidden, and everyone forgets about it.. Until a few weeks later when the mother of the person whos house party it was, makes some sandwiches, and when scraping some butter from the tub, notices the butter becomes brown halfway down.

Turns out the guy who hid the turd, took the butter out of the tub, put his turd in, and then put the butter back on top! Genius.
(scazy_lumbag, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 16:44, 11 replies)

Ruddy heck!
Now that will take some skill!
(Ghostlight, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 16:49, closed)

you'd have to be a particularly dangerously retarded kind of moron
to a) suggest this or
b) go along with it when someone else suggests it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 16:50, closed)

Of course
It might just be a lie. But then again, it's on the internet, so it almost certainly isn't. Almost certainly.
( Bazongaloid, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 16:52, closed)

that's what I was getting at my friend
I didn't want to dive in with the accusations straight away though ;-)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 16:53, closed)

Think i read this on a different QOTW
And I hope to God it is not true
(BarryChuckle, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 16:54, closed)

buttered turd
Read about that on a different QOTW but it was a crazy flatmate who did their business in all sorts of unusual places. I think.
( stopmeandslapme Cometh the hour, cometh your mum, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 16:59, closed)

Bit of an urban legend this one
I was told it at uni too, but then here it is on b3ta already:

b3ta.com/questions/shitstories/post9069

Also, books.google.co.uk/books?id=kgw7wX7e56kC&pg=PA124&lpg=PA124&dq=HIde+the+Turd+Margarine&source=web&ots=AOOfErk_jM&sig=rtHQiq-PgMo9LXDqW5Pu0QODVyY&hl=en&sa=X&oi=book_result&resnum=1&ct=result


/edit still, cracking story though, would like to think it's true.
( rofl harris, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 17:04, closed)

Just asked my ex housemate about it on msn..
He's pretty sure that it is true, and that his mate was playing the game.
(scazy_lumbag, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 17:07, closed)

suppose so
It's an obvious place to hide a turd.
( rofl harris, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 17:13, closed)

I guess....
Now that I've seen 2 girls eating shit from a cup I believe anything is entirely possible.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 17:20, closed)

I heard this one back in uni, around 1997
my mate swore blind it was true
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 14:28, closed)