Halloween last year
Halloween last year.....

Every halloween me and my friends tend to make the effort to dress up. The girls generally dress like sluts and wear less make up than usual, and the boys tend to use the occasion as an excuse to wear black nail varnish (that might just be me).

So, last year, I decide what I’m wearing, and one of my friends decides what he’s wearing. The getting ready process is deemed to be a two man job, applying lipstick, make up, props etc etc, so we decide, let’s get ready at my place and get really drunk in the process. Ok, he says, and informs me that his girlfriend, who is going as Wednesday from the Adams family will pop round to pick something up from him. Ok I say, and we get the beer, smokes and tunes going.

Little be known to me, that the item my friends girlfriend was picking up was a doll. Apparently, Wednesday carries around a doll with her at all times.

Let’s fast forward two days as from the moment I got dressed, drunk and left that night, we kind of ended up on a three day bender, and the crescendo being, me getting lucky with an older woman. We get back to mine, and bearing in mind it had been two nights since I sported the halloween costume.

We start kissing, and she’s getting horny so we decide to take into the bed room, I aint slept in there for nearly four days now so the bed is beautifully made. Were really into it now and we start getting undressed, and generally more excited. I still can’t remember how it happened, because I was monumentally drunk but all of a sudden, this fucking barbie doll has appeared right between us. I was fucking horrified, how can a startled 24 year old lad, explain toa 38 year old woman how a fucking barbie doll has got into his bed?

My mate, the cunt thought it would be funny to put his girlfriends barbie doll in my bed as she had found some better doll. In fairness to him, he apologised later, and he is still known in the group as a pussy blocker.

To be fair, I thought this girl would see the funny side, but she just looked at me like I was a paedophile and called me a sick bastard.
(Sir_Digby_Chicken_Caeser [email protected], Thu 6 Nov 2008, 20:03, 2 replies)

Simple enough-
tell her that your mate pulled a prank on you and toss the doll aside, with as much importance as if it had been a tee shirt. Then turn your full attentions to her. If she still gets freaked out after that, she's probably not worth having.

Unless you have My Little Pony posters on the walls, I would think she'd understand well enough.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Thu 6 Nov 2008, 20:57, closed)

Jeepers creepers
It was a Barbie doll, not a fucking severed baby's arm.

SHE sounds like the weird one to me!
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:55, closed)