Easy targets, students.

When younger and being educated at the ‘school of life’, most of my friends were at uni. The situation was thus:

The problem – I was broke
The plan – become the Uni’s answer to Pablo Escobar
The problem (2) – I had no idea where to get drugs from.
The potential – Some students (particularly freshers) are knicker-stretchingly naive.
The plan (2) – Blag it

The tools:

A couple of small plastic bags
A bit of tinfoil.
A handful of your average paracetamols
Some carefully unwrapped oxo cubes
A sheet of paper with lots of tiny random icons printed on it, dipped in aftershave then cut into little squares
Baking soda / Talcum powder

Each ingredient was wrapped in a half-arsed manner and given just enough handling to make them look third hand (at least)

As soon as Freshers week started I would go out with my mates then break away from them for an hour or so and proceed to sit in a dimly lit corner of the pub looking shifty in a long coat.

Slowly but surely I would be approached by a procession of spotty oiks enquiring if they could ‘score some gear’.

Before long I was being considered a one-stop shop for all questionable merchandise.

The pub-rotation policy was a bit difficult but a necessary evil to prevent a bad reputation; if I ever was approached by a disgruntled former customer I merely complained that I was sold a ‘duff batch’ and whinge about how much money I lost etc. However, complaints were rare as it appeared the placebo effect of fake drugs is quite decent, and kids would rather fake being high than admit to being stiffed by household comestibles

I was always careful to do this practice for a couple of weeks and no more a term. Everybody had forgotten about me by the next time I rolled in, armed to the teeth in general home products

The great part was that even if there was a raid, I wasn’t holding anything remotely illegal.

All in all I continued the practice for about 5 years, but unfortunately I can’t say exactly how much I earned because I spent it all on beer.

Happy days
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Fri 1 Aug 2008, 13:54, 8 replies)

Lucky
I'm not a lawyer (obviously), but I'm fairly sure it counts as deception, even if it is illegal drugs that you're pretending to sell.

So if you had have got cought you would have been in trouble.
(netpixie you should reconsider your life choices., Fri 1 Aug 2008, 14:00, closed)

@netpixie

True, but I was safe in the knowledge that I could've downed the entire batch if required and suffer no worse after effects than a rather stodgy poo
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Fri 1 Aug 2008, 14:10, closed)

^Caught
Did you sell them the drugs based on an universally (or should that be university) recognised names or did you sell them as "macckies", "scrouch", any other made up name? My mate sold a lot of scrouch (I think it was mainly baking soda with a few paracetamol crushed in) but as everyone wanted to be hip they bought it and those that complained were told scrouch is baking soda and paracetamol good for stain removal or headache cures!
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 1 Aug 2008, 14:11, closed)

Highly Illegal
Sorry to burst your bubble, but what you were doing was highly illegal. Case of R v Shivpuri (1987) in House of Lords held that a person who thinks he is carrying illegal drugs or makes out that perfectly legal things are illegal drugs you would still be done for possession with intent to supply.

Sorry to burst your bubble
(triley, Fri 1 Aug 2008, 16:22, closed)

R v Shivpuri
R v Shivpuri involved smuggling fake drugs through customs.
There was an intention to evade customs so there was an intention to commit an illegal act, the "mens rea".

If you intend to supply squares of blotting paper there is no criminal intention - so where is the crime? Let me look into this!!
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Fri 1 Aug 2008, 16:45, closed)

You naughty boy
but a good idea!

Edit: to the above poster, doesn't an offence need both an actus reus and a mens rea?

Surely you couldn't be done simply for a guilty mind? If you can be, I better run. I've thought some filthy thoughts recently.
(Stevie Ruggling, Sat 2 Aug 2008, 0:44, closed)

rat poison sprayed
on blotter paper gives a nasty acid-like effect. cheap as hell to make too
( Azathoth thinks my name isn't so bad..., Sat 2 Aug 2008, 23:19, closed)

well
Generally, crimes need an actus reus and mens rea.

However, if someone gave you something you thought was a bag of drugs and told you to smuggle it, and you did, even if it wasn't drugs, you'd be guilty of attempted smuggling/whatever, because you had the mens rea. It's attempted, not successful, because the crime of smuggling itself is impossible in this case.

So, that would point to you not being guilty because you didn't think they were drugs. However, given that prosecuting someone for an inchoate (attempted) offence when they didn't have drugs after all is ridiculous, and involves a fairly twisted bit of legal logic, I'm pretty sure they could have whipped something up for you.
(LickOutTheJamsMotherfuckers!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 1:36, closed)