I have no idea how to get rich.
But I know lots of ways that will stop you being rich.

For a start, stay single. Most girls are just failures at life. Its as simple as that, and as a guy you'll be leant on financially. This is after all the wooing her in by paying for meals, cinema, nights out etc. Seriously, the cheapest shag you'll ever get will be from a whore.

Secondly, never buy a car. They drink fuel like they are going out of fashion which is expensive. Then they need servicing and repairs. And at £75 an hour at the stealers (in order to keep your warranty" its a tad on the pricey side. Once driving you open yourself up to Parking fines, speeding fines etc on top of that. Not to mention road tax.

Thirdly, Dont have your own place to live. Rent, Council Tax, Gas, Electric, Water, TV License, Phone Line, Internet, Food, Maintenance Gee it adds up to a whacking great sum. Stay at home with the parents for as long as possible guys!

Fourth, avoid trendy bars. At £3 - £4 a for a pint of watered down pish, youd probably get more benefit from drinking your own urine. basically dont go out. Spend your Saturday nights wanking over free pron on the internet.

So its as easy as that. Stay single, walk, stay at home and never go out. You will be the richest man on earth then.

Oh and finally, dont get a job in I.T Despite what most people think. It doesnt pay that well. I know some cleaners who earn more per hour than I do.
(Miggyman, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 8:11, 10 replies)

Thanks for that...

As I am a home-owning, married-with-kids, car driving IT manager, you have just confirmed what I have suspected all along...

That I am a big fat loser.

This also explains why I am broke all.of.the.time.

If it wasn't for the fact I don't go to trendy wine bars, I don't think i'd be able to survive.
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 8:51, closed)

Oh yeah forgot to mention about the kids.
Theyre the biggest drain of them all :)

But hey, having a loving wife, an awesome car, a brilliant house and great kids just goes to show that money isnt everything guys :)
Though it can buy you an awesome car and a brilliant house :) - and even a loving wife if you prefer the Thai flavour :D
(Miggyman, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 8:57, closed)

also
No need to waste money on food.

Hang out the back of Pret a Manger on a Thursday evening, and you'll get given free sandwiches and coffee. You'll find yourself amongst other like minded individuals who've also managed to streamline their expenditure to a minimum.
( rofl harris, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:55, closed)

Maybe but
Try and find a girl friend that is a hooker.

Renting, great idea especially if you then sub let.

Rent a car when you need one.

Trendy bars, take you hooker girl friend out let her buy the drinks.

IT, put SAP in your CV.

Then you can have a life without it costing a fortune. If only.....
(nee22 NL ExPat, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:49, closed)

terribly sad, this...
You're either far too young to be so bitter, or far too old to be living at home with your mum.
(no way hose is staring unemployment in the face on, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:43, closed)

So...
...you're single, live with your parents, don't drive, and spend your nights alone wanking to net porn.

Gee, where do I sign to be like you?
(Musuko, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:03, closed)

Oh dear...
Get this man some help, please. Quickly. Either that, or pass him some feckin' painkillers, about 50 should do it...oh, and a 1.5ltr bottle of Bells.

Meh.
(woodkat loves comic sans, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:50, closed)

She was one of the early birds, and you were one of the worms.
"Most girls are just failures at life. Its as simple as that, and as a guy you'll be leant on financially. This is after all the wooing her in by paying for meals, cinema, nights out etc. Seriously, the cheapest shag you'll ever get will be from a whore."

I've earnt considerably more than every man I've dated and the circumstances are only changing now because I'm leaving the high powered job for my pHd.

If it's costing you that much to take a girl out, then you're obviously dating escort girls, m'dear. *grin*
(Janitor Sinister, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 20:48, closed)

Cars Women and Renting
It’s been 3 years since I owned a car. My last one being a two seat sports car bought to annoy my ex wife. “ How can you transport the kids around in that ? ” Just the reaction I was looking for. “ I could always borrow your car, ” she was not a happy bunny.

Anyway the convertible lasted about a year until it was written off. Time to get a new car, but I didn’t get one, kept the cash from the insurance and moved closer to work. One advantage or renting it’s easy to move.

This was a bit of a surprise to my new G/F. She was not a happy bunny. She started to use taxis but soon gave that up and now uses public transport. To be fair she did run of with a bloke with a BMW for a couple of weeks so getting rid of you flash sports car has it’s risks.

From being a total petrol head to having no car, it’s easy just say no.
(nee22 NL ExPat, Tue 5 Aug 2008, 9:54, closed)