Men aging better than women.
It seems that a lot of men grow in to their looks and become truly sexy in their 40's. However, us girls hit 30 and start falling to bits. Aging just seems to bring on more places to shave and watching helplessly as your once lovely bosoms succumb to gravity at an alarming rate. Also, I'm increasingly mithered about my fertility and if by the time I find a nice man it will be too late. I'm 32 and with friends marrying and having kids left right and centre I'm properly freaking out about being left on the shelf.
Dreams of a lovely white wedding with a big frock are fading fast. Instead, I'll probably be one of those women who out of fear of dying alone get married to any old weirdo in my 60's, wearing a lemon two piece suit and court shoes. I'll probably have to have strangers as witnesses to the marriage as all my actual family will be dead by then. Of course, at that age we won't be having kids or be able to adopt. I'll probably end up collecting those hideous Edwardian dolls to compensate for being barren.
Some friends had a baby yesterday - I think it's playing on my mind a bit.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Sat 9 Jun 2012, 17:25, 15 replies)

lemon suits are great for pensioners
they don't show the piss stains
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 9 Jun 2012, 17:59, closed)

Your welcome to move next door to me and collect stray cats in your single doteage whilst i will be the bitter neighbour who shouts inane gibberish at passers by whilst filling his house to the brim with newspapers and crap from skips until a film crew comes around to make a low budget freeview documentary on people the social services hire to tidy up messy houses.
You can bitch on to me about how men are all a bunch of arseholes whilst i bemoan women as being just superficial snakes with tits.

See you there.
(Finster Ate a cat biscuit for a bet, Sat 9 Jun 2012, 18:18, closed)

Smash - exactly.
Finster - sounds perfect. Let's do it now rather than later.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Sat 9 Jun 2012, 20:42, closed)

Garfunkel and Oates have this covered.
youtu.be/H-gfxjAaZg0
(uncle_bud is not the jelly roll king., Sat 9 Jun 2012, 21:41, closed)

Not seen that before.
Pretty darn accurate. :-(
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Sat 9 Jun 2012, 23:35, closed)

The average age of brides in the UK is 30
and the standard deviation is huge. Lots of women have babies at 40. You're not on the shelf yet :)

P.S. There's always online dating. And then cats.
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Sat 9 Jun 2012, 22:16, closed)

Cheers :)
Hate Internet dating following an epically bad date last year. Will save that delight for another QOTW.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Sat 9 Jun 2012, 23:29, closed)

Shall I send you some sperm in the post?

(Tont, Sat 9 Jun 2012, 23:25, closed)

Yes please.
It's nice to get post when you live on your own :)
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Sat 9 Jun 2012, 23:29, closed)

Mithered is a lovely word
(Bitter and Twisted, Sun 10 Jun 2012, 0:42, closed)

Good grief.
You've got years of natural fertility left; and then HRT and IVF mean that you can still have kids into your seventies - assuming, that is, that you think that a genetic link counts for anything to begin with. It doesn't. If you really want kids, just adopt, ffs.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Sun 10 Jun 2012, 14:00, closed)

See the small logical part of my brain knows you are right.
But the far larger part of my brain is illogical, aging and ruined by hormones.
What can I say...bitches be crazy.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Sun 10 Jun 2012, 20:19, closed)

Your problem is that
you're 32 and you are still holding out for a nice man. You're going to have to lower your sights a bit and either settle for a dependant or a cat.
(the other guy not the one that gave you coochie warts, Sun 10 Jun 2012, 23:23, closed)

I'll fuck you in the dark if you like.

(SSSSSSSSSS, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 13:08, closed)

Ha ha!

(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 13:53, closed)