Satan, Sunday School, and a Lovely School Outing
Coventry - sprawling metropolis, the inspiration behind Gotham City, no doubt. A mecca for anything and everything of worth and value in this abstruse world of ours.

Like most Coventry kids, at about the age of six or seven my class got in a bus and went down to the remains of Coventry Cathedral, bombed to fuck in the war, to have a look round and draw some pictures of bits of rubble.

Now, this wasn't really my fault. I lay the blame squarely on the fact that I was forced to go to Sunday School to learn about God, and good and bad, and all that bollocks.

My class teacher, Mrs Facey, has all us little angels sat in a circle on the ground, the great remains of Coventry Cathedral stretching up and round us, looming.

Mrs Facey asks: "Can anyone tell me why the Germans bombed this place?"

My hand shoots up, so do another twenty or so little podgy limbs sporting chubby little fingers.

But I know the answer. I learned it in Sunday School, they'd taught us all about the type of evil bastards who'd burn a church, let alone a fucking whacking great big cathedral.

Before Mrs Facey could choose a child to answer I shout at the top of my lungs:

"BECAUSE THE GERMANS WERE SATANISTS, MISS!!!"

Several passersby stopped and stared, I sat there with a big smug smile on my face, knowing I'd given the right answer.

Later that day when my mum came to pick me up from school, I wondered why Mrs Facey pulled her to one side to have a quiet word with her...
( SpankyHanky, Fri 20 Mar 2009, 14:39, 2 replies)

Coventry
When I was unlucky enough to be posted there, I used to 'joke' with some locals about the bombings.

I used to say "Surely the Germans would have given you idea about how shit this place is? I mean, they did fucking bomb you to the ground twice"

Looking back, it seems that I am indeed a twat. But I did not like my time in Coventy, and spent the vast majority of it a drunken wreck. I recently went up for the Marathon and loved it.

Must be the difference between the north and south sides of the city. I hated the Foleshill area!
( The_Commander_of_Skips wears his sunglasses at night, Fri 20 Mar 2009, 17:07, closed)

Mate
I now live in London.

Say no more...
( SpankyHanky, Fri 20 Mar 2009, 17:22, closed)