cerebral crosswiring
I'm a synaestehetic, which means the sensory receptors in my brain are crosswrired so that I feel sounds, smell tastes and hear sensations etc. Many people experience this to some minor degree (you feel that Wednesdays are purple, for example) but I'm a medically-certified sufferer.

It was most extreme when I was a kid, and it allowed me more than a few secret pleasures. Listening to ABC's "The Look of Love" generated a powerful sensation of chocolate in my mouth, while eating actual chocolate altered my vision in much the same way as LSD might. If I ran my hand over the cat, I'd hear birdsong. It was fun experimenting.

The best experience of those times was my brief relationship with Deborah de Angelo. The phonetics of her name brought whisky to my tongue; her blonde hair made me hear cellos; her green cardigan caused a raging boner, and the sensation of her busy mouth upon my swollen helmet made me taste a full English breakfast.

Those days are over. With medication, my only pleasure these days is retiring to bed with a cowbell, mint humbugs and Toni Braxton's "Unbreak My Heart" - all of which, in combination, conspire to bring about the sensation of a hamster up my anus.
(frankspencer, Sun 16 Mar 2008, 20:56, 9 replies)

is this for real?
if so.. whats the bizzarest combo you've come accross?

apart from the hamster...
(Neomancer last looked smug on, Mon 17 Mar 2008, 0:21, closed)

Ha ha,
spot the newbie.
( Bob Todd whee, Mon 17 Mar 2008, 0:48, closed)

Yes,
I had something useful to ask someone with this condition, until I got to the end of the story and saw the author.
(Edktstsss, Mon 17 Mar 2008, 1:12, closed)

Aww
frankspencer, you dawg.
(ShitBitch, Mon 17 Mar 2008, 9:15, closed)

This is brilliant.
Thank you.
(Half of Stephen Fry's right buttock pissed on your dog on, Mon 17 Mar 2008, 9:18, closed)

I actually read the first two paragraphs..
before reading who posted it.
You are a bad man, I thought I was learning something!
(Siouxfan I'm not staring at you, I am just short sighted, Mon 17 Mar 2008, 12:42, closed)

I secretly hope
that despite us all thinking that frank makes these things up, that every single one of them is true.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Mar 2008, 13:48, closed)

vipros
Oddly enough, it's the true stories that no one ever believes
(frankspencer, Mon 17 Mar 2008, 14:23, closed)

nah
i been lurking ages.

i even wikipedied it.. its a legitimate thing to suffer..
(Neomancer last looked smug on, Mon 17 Mar 2008, 19:11, closed)