Something something coming and going at all times of day or night
Something doesn't have a job something something lazy as fuck something something shits in the corner of the kitchen and expects me to clean it up something something turns out he's a cat
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 16 Mar 2015, 16:20, 16 replies)

Something something you furries disgust me something something.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 16 Mar 2015, 18:33, closed)

Something something yiff yiff miaow something
He's in the bad books at the moment as he went out on Friday night with his expensive collar and name tag and returned on Saturday morning without it. I'm convinced he's actually hidden it under the bed somewhere, but now he knows how to take it off we need to get a whole different type of collar anyway :(
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 16 Mar 2015, 20:09, closed)

something something only pussy without a starwars figure up it something

(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Mon 16 Mar 2015, 18:38, closed)

Amusingly (to me, at least), I don't actually own any Star Wars figures, I gave mine away to a friend who really likes Star Wars years back
Unless you count the Stormtrooper, that is, but he's life-sized and people get inside him, not the other way around. Usually, he stands on a mannequin guarding the games room.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 16 Mar 2015, 20:12, closed)

i find your lack of foof disturbing

(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Mon 16 Mar 2015, 20:42, closed)

Yeah, sadly the legendary "Star Wars figure in minge" photo was random tumblr ephemera
I never had even the slightest part in it. I sometimes wonder if the person who really took that photo gets half the amount of shit that I do for it, but he's probably in LA or something publishing his third doorstep coffee table book of artistic nudes or something. The bastard.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 16 Mar 2015, 21:11, closed)

I mean, while we're on the subject, and I know this will break poor Monty's heart, but the same goes for the legendary "bird in a Yoda mask up a tree" picture
I have no idea where that came from. I only found it myself after about half an hour of googling on some Russian site that was hosting our pictures alongside it. I don't think it's even shot in Britain from the architecture, though if anyone can prove me wrong I'm willing to learn.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 16 Mar 2015, 21:30, closed)

Careful with all this honesty, someone will accuse you of being upset.

(McChinaman banned, Tue 17 Mar 2015, 6:04, closed)

You'd think that the truth would set you free,
but I doubt it.
Still, "emvee sticks Lego 'troopers in girls' fannies" is a better meme than "Ed Fannybaws".
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 17 Mar 2015, 9:17, closed)

It's fine, they have memories like goldfish anyway, they'll be back next week posting "LOL bird up a tree" as if I'd never said anything
But it is like going up to Jim Carrey and saying "Haha, you fucking spaz, The Waterboy was such a shit film!"
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Tue 17 Mar 2015, 9:43, closed)

I hope you expire in a conflagration.

(immadme, Mon 16 Mar 2015, 20:54, closed)

It's fine
I have that covered
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 16 Mar 2015, 20:59, closed)