What, because I don't fancy Holly Walsh?
Gotta tell you, this knight in shining armour thing never works.

Hey Holly Walsh. When you're googling yourself, here are a couple of things you need to know:

1. You're ugly.

2. Next time you're invited onto Buzzcocks, try actually saying something, that's what they're paying you to do.

3. Scarpe wants to fuck you. You can gaz him for the arrangements. He's a bit short, if that puts you off he'll settle for a pair of your dirty knickers instead.
(username failed moderation, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:38, 1 reply)

Are you upset, laddie?
You should go and have a nice sit down and a cup of tea.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:40, closed)

No, I'm not upset.
Shall I get you a cuppa while I'm there? fancy a slice of toast? Pair of built up shoes?
(username failed moderation, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:42, closed)

Sorry
It's just that you seemd to be taking the internetting lark a bit seriouly there, so I assumed you were all worked up.

Do let me know where you got this fancy computer that tells you how tall someone is by their typing though, because all mine does is tell me when someone can't string an argument together and gets reduced to slinging shit in the dark instead.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:46, closed)

PC world

(username failed moderation, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:47, closed)

Cunt off fucko
Leave scarpe alone, he's nearly two years sober and you're trying to drive him to drink
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:00, closed)

It's OK Rory
It's only you I let really affect me. Why must you hurt me so?
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:04, closed)

It's alright scarpe, you might be short, and bald, and a bit yellow, and collect spiderman comics, and weirdly rate 'Daredevil' as somehow watchable, but you're all man and that's what counts out here in qotw

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:13, closed)

Look, to be honest
after a few beers, I probably would shag Holly Walsh, but she's still no fucking oil painting, is she?
(username failed moderation, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:25, closed)

I think she's cute in that pixie-like way:

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:36, closed)

More of a
'horse-like way'.

That pic is not typical of her, most of the time she looks fucking miserble.
(username failed moderation, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:39, closed)

Methinks the lady doth protest too much.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:43, closed)

I already said, I'd give her one,
but only if Sarah Millican wasn't available.
(username failed moderation, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:46, closed)

Save it for the judge, Mr Walsh.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:50, closed)