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This is a question I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke

Challenge: write a joke. As simple joke with a setup and a punchline.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT - IGNORING THIS COULD RESULT IN BAN

* Don't steal jokes - write them
* Don't flood post
* Just don't be a dick ok?

So join in and write a bad joke and apologise for it.

Read Latest | Highest Voted

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Wed 8 Aug 2018, 9:00)
Pages: Latest, 44, 43, 42, 41, 40, 39, 38, 37, 36, 35, 34, 33, ... 1

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Kanye West was in the news after masturbating into his late mother's sister's eyes so much that it made her profusely sick.
He lost numerous lucrative business deals thanks to his flagrant auntie's emetism.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Thu 3 Nov 2022, 15:23, 1 reply, 2 years ago)
Kanye West was in the news after masturbating into the eyes of a family of social terrestrial insects.
He lost numerous lucrative business deals thanks to his flagrant ant eye semen-tism.
(I helped save b3ta! the prick of misery pierced my foot on a spiiiike on, Wed 2 Nov 2022, 5:01, 3 replies, latest was 2 years ago)
Why did Chris Martin not enjoy the string quartet?
It was all cello
(I helped save b3ta! cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Wed 26 Oct 2022, 11:37, Reply)
What was the name of the Eggman's wife?
Yolko Ono (Happiness is a warm pun.)
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 21 Oct 2022, 14:51, 8 replies, latest was 2 years ago)
Which creepy /links weirdo likes a good beer buzz early in the morning?
SoakCooker!!!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Thu 13 Oct 2022, 9:09, 5 replies, latest was 2 years ago)
Which female English singer with two top tens in 1977 likes a good beer buzz early in the morning?
Alkie Brooks!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Oct 2022, 19:03, 2 replies, latest was 1 year ago)
What do you call a Ukrainian terrorist who partially destroyed a bridge by masturbating into its eyes?
Semen Eyedenko
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Wed 12 Oct 2022, 14:38, Reply)
What do you call a type of clothing, also known as a kilt, when worn by a Scottsman that masturbates into someone's eyes?
A mini-squirt
(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Wed 12 Oct 2022, 11:53, Reply)
What do you call it when somebody cums into someone's eyes before undertaking a robbery?
A splash and grab.
(Covid69 Boris variant., Wed 12 Oct 2022, 11:24, Reply)
What do you call the act of theft by someone that masturbates into the victims eyes?
A rubbery.
(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Wed 12 Oct 2022, 10:24, Reply)
What do you call a primitive warrior who clubs his opponents to death after blinding them by masturbating into their eyes?
Onan the Barbarian!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Tue 11 Oct 2022, 22:35, 1 reply, 2 years ago)
What do you call someone who steals from financial institutions by masturbating into the cashier's eyes?
A wank robber!
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 11 Oct 2022, 22:32, Reply)
What do you call a man who comandeers a plane after incapacitating the pilot by masturbating into their eyes?
A hijackulator!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Tue 11 Oct 2022, 15:36, Reply)
Why is Florian Cloud de Bounevialle O'Malley Armstrong's herd of female deer black?
Because she Dido!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Tue 11 Oct 2022, 6:50, Reply)
Why is Cilla Black?
Because Danny Dyer!
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 10 Oct 2022, 21:34, Reply)
This guy was trying to explain to me
the complex principles of umbrella construction and demonstrated how they work by opening it.

Needless to say it went over my head.
(I helped save b3ta! Araucaria is such a tit, Sun 2 Oct 2022, 21:14, Reply)
What's Liz Truss opening this week?

Borked markets!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Thu 29 Sep 2022, 14:53, Reply)
My job as a portrait artist is great
and I always enjoy the reactions from satisfied customers, like this woman the other day, her face was a picture.
(I helped save b3ta! Araucaria is such a tit, Thu 29 Sep 2022, 14:40, Reply)
What do you call a woman who is very similar to the late Diana, Princess of Wales in every respect except that she is a fanatical supporter of the Islamic State Group?
Di-ish.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Wed 28 Sep 2022, 13:22, 4 replies, latest was 2 years ago)
I've just been on holiday to a city on the French Riviera.
It was Nice.
(Covid69 Boris variant., Sun 25 Sep 2022, 15:54, 5 replies, latest was 2 years ago)
Heard about the Jamiacan double glazing company?
They make windows, doors, and patois
(Wtfcu12, Sat 24 Sep 2022, 19:38, 1 reply, 2 years ago)
Which Star Wars character can you see through?
Mace Window
(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Wed 21 Sep 2022, 8:48, 15 replies, latest was 2 years ago)
So I got in a fight with a mop.
Wiped the floor with him.
(Testicles just for you, Wed 21 Sep 2022, 1:28, Reply)
English, Irish and Scottish sheep
all walk into a baa
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 19 Sep 2022, 23:52, 1 reply, 2 years ago)
What was the only noise heard during the two minute silence?
The Queen's coffin'.
(Covid69 Boris variant., Mon 19 Sep 2022, 19:11, Reply)
Whats the difference between 10 blended fetus's and a tied up 13 year old?
I dont have 10 blended fetuses in my freezer
(BoofMaster420, Mon 19 Sep 2022, 4:48, 5 replies, latest was 2 years ago)
What do you call a man with a spade in his head?
An ambulance
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sun 18 Sep 2022, 15:10, Reply)
Did you hear about the new 'Jihad' automatic inflatable sex doll.
It blows itself up.
(I helped save b3ta! notoolsovernight you're all luvvly an' 'orrible, Wed 14 Sep 2022, 11:16, Reply)
"So, do you remember what were you doing when you heard the news?"
"Yes, I was watching the news."
(Covid69 Boris variant., Fri 9 Sep 2022, 8:16, Reply)

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