Not a mother in law
but a mother none the less - and boy do I feel sorry for the poor girl that's going to end up with this woman as a MIL...

...I was about ten and was invited around a mates house. He's half Jewish and half British, so I never realised he was part Jewish till I met his mum. And oh boy do Jewish mother's live up to their reputation...

...We were watching TV and it was a bit loud, cue screams from the next rooom to "turn that racket down if you know what's good for you!" So I tried to turn down the volume but must have hit thw wrong button. I pressed again and held and watched as the colour drained from the screen. I tried turning it back but his remote was full of weird symbols and I was used to my remote which simply said "colour". He grabbed the remote off of me, and at the time I didn't realise why he was so panicky.

So the mother comes back in because it's still loud and she sees the TV is now black and white. She looks at my mate holding the remote:
"What have you done!?"
"Buh-buh-buh"
The poor kid was bricking it. And, with good reason. She marched over and walloped him around the face in a brutal backhand that literally knocked him off his chair and left him face down on the floor clutching his cheek. whimpering. She continued to yell something incomprehensible and then turned to me. She said completely calmy "I think you should go home now". Being ten and an abject coward, I wasn't about to disagree. I left and could hear the screams continuing from indoors. And to add salt to the wound, my mum wasn't due to pick me up for another three hours. I was in the middle of nowehre, not knowing which way was home and had to sit on the roadside for three hours. I've never been so glad to not be Jewish.
( Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Thu 8 Sep 2005, 13:34, Reply)