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This is a question Lurid Work Stories

"I know a railwayman of 40-odd years' service," says Juan Quar, "and he tells me a new gruesome yarn each time we meet. Last week's was of checking the time on the wristwatch of a severed arm he'd just collected after a track fatality."

Tell us the horrible stories you tease the new hires with, or that you've been told.
NB By definition, these are probably all made up. Roll with it

(, Thu 5 Sep 2013, 17:33)
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A good book,
and breakfast in the morning?
(, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 16:49, 1 reply)
No thanks, I've got a headache.

(, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 16:55, closed)
Take two of these*, and call me in the morning.
*my testicles
(, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 16:57, closed)
Thanks.
*takes*

*throws to dog*
(, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 16:58, closed)
What dog?

(, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 18:16, closed)
I was hoping that police dog would arrive at this point

(, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 18:39, closed)

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