Mistaken house
When I was at uni I lived in a shared house on a fairly busy street. It was the most interesting bit of a fairly quiet town and had some nice pubs which meant that it had its fair share of pissed passers-by.

3am on Monday morning, the buzzer on my intercom started going insane. Pulling the duvet over my head I tried to ignore it since pissed-up chavs had quite often rung the bell in the middle of the night just for a "laugh". However, after about 5 minutes of incesssant buzzing I realised that the person leaning on the button wasn't going away of their own accord so I picked up the entryphone..

ff_m: Yeah?

Drunken female voice: Daaaaaave! Is that Dave?! [my name is not Dave]

ff_m: No, it's not Dave, I think you've got the wrong house.

DFV: No I haven't. I know that's you Daaaaave!

ff_m: Seriously I'm not Dave.

DFV: Well I know he's there I want to talk to Dave.

ff_m: There's noone called Dave living here, nor has there ever been. You really have got the wrong place. Stop ringing the bell.

At this stage I went back to bed and pulled the duvet over my head again. The buzzing stopped for at least 10 seconds until:

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt!

ff_m: What?

DFV: Daaaaaaaave!

Putting down the entry phone I walked to the front door to be confronted with, predictably, a drunk looking woman.

ff_m: Look! There's noone called Dave living here, I'm not messing you around, and I want to go back to sleep. Go away!

DLW: I know Dave lives here, his house is between a chinese supermarket and a newsagents!

ff_m: Is it really? Take a look to your left.

Drunk woman looks to her left and sees the chemists to one side of my house.

ff_m: And to your right.

Drunk woman looks to her right and is confronted with a Spar-type supermarket that does not look remotely chinese.

DLW: Oh I'm so sorry! I...

ff_m: Don't worry about it, goodnight. [shuts door]

I was genuinely amazed by the amount of evidence that was required to convince this woman that I was not Dave nor was this Dave's house. To this day I wonder what would have happened if I'd said "Yeah come on in Dave's upstairs."
(flimflam_machine, Wed 6 Jun 2007, 12:10, Reply)