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This is a question Mistaken Identity

Jizzbiscuits-Murphy writes, "I was punched at a friend's party by a drunk who thought I was Russell Brand"

Well, if you dress anything like him, you probably deserved it, but who have you been mistaken for/mistaken other people for?

(, Thu 31 May 2007, 14:49)
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This question is now closed.

Baseball Coaches are whoremongers.
The worst case of mistaken identity that I have even been part of was when I was in the states travelling around with some mates. I had bought a random baseball cap somewhere because I thought that it was the done thing, and it kept the sun out of my eyes when I was driving etc etc. Should have done my research really.

I think it might have been an atlanta braves cap actually but it was irrelevent to me as i didnt really care what team it was. Anyway, we had stopped at a service station just outside miami and we were sitting outside eating lunch.

This middle aged bloke wanders by and glances at us and, you guessed it, does a movie style double take at my baseball cap. So be waddles up to our picnic table and starts *trying* to argue with me over 'my baseball team'. He was going on about how my coach went with prostitutes and it was really filthy and un-christian and he was going to hell. So I just told him the truth about just buying a random hat. My mates were sniggering like hell. Damn them. As soon as he heard my english accent though he got even more angry. He was pretty much shouting now, and all the people lazing outside started to stare even more.

He said how he couldnt believe how the english could be fans of baseball and particularly the atlanta braves led by their evil whore-mongering coach... it became too much and I just wanted to go so I shepherded my mates into the car with the dude following us and then I thought christ, why should I have to take all that crap, so before I got into the car (and more importantly while the engine was running) I shouted into his face "Yeah well your guy blows goats". Then zoink! Into the car and onto the motorway.

I actually think he tried to follow us for a few miles but i cant be sure.

So, er, ahem. I was mistaken for a baseball fan.

Length? Dude, that was some serious goaty goodness.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 16:47, Reply)
off jimmy's farm apparently, but im not sure what he looks like
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 16:46, Reply)
Said to me by various people...
On a messageboard I post on, people have likened me to Konnnie Huq. We're both Asian, and thats as far as the resemblance goes.

I've also been told I look like Madhuri Dixit, and Martina Hingis. If Hingis had a really really deep tan, obviously.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 15:27, Reply)
The decline in standards..........
A few years ago, it used to be Stephen Tompkinson from Ballykissangel, then it turned into Fran from Travis. Of late it's been James Nesbit.

Give it a few years, It'll be Shane McGowan.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 15:15, Reply)
'The Lurker' is such good friend of mine....
So it's a Bank Holiday, we're all out at a club on the Sunday and I meet a friend of a friend. We get on very well leading to a hungover holiday Monday watching films, eating Jaffa Cakes etc, it goes so well she invites me to her birthday party the next week.

Then I have a big haircut.

So I arrive at her party, and none of my mates are there yet. I don't know anyone, so I gets a drink and stand at the bar. The Girl comes over to say 'Hello' and there's the small talk. This continues for a few minutes before I apologize for not being able to stay long because I was DJing in a club in the centre of town...
"No way, I was going to go to that but it's my party so I can't! How you know The Lurker?"

Being smooth as I am, "......."

"I love The Lurker, he's a close friend of mine, one of those really nice guys..are you mates with Andy too?"

She proceeds to name drop me to myself for the next five minutes, and praise the lord, it was all positive. I'm standing there with a huge smile of my face feeling like a big shot whilst a blonde beauty is firing in to me by telling me how friendly she is with 'The Lurker'.

After that, the game was mine.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 15:08, Reply)
Anita Roddick, my twin.
I've lost count of the number of times I've walked into The Body Shop and seen the staff freeze in mild panic. I wouldn't mind being mistaken for Anita Roddick only she's about 20 years older than me.....
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 14:13, Reply)
At the Galway Guiness Oyster Festival last year
when an English guy taps me on the shoulder and exclaims 'Jesus you look just like our mate Dave'. He then calls over his friends who all started laughing at the similarity. Dave was meant to be with the lads for the weekend in Galway but had to cancel at the last minute so they asked me to pose with them in some photo's so they could show Dave when they got home.
They then proceeded to wander around the entire marquee and found a girl who closest resembled Dave's fiance. I then had to pose with my 'fiance' for a few more photo's.
They then bought me a pint and let me get back to my group of friends.
For the rest of the evening I had to answer to Sneep from my own friends and Dave for whenever Dave's mates passed me on the way to the dancefloor/toilet/bar.
I now have a small insight into what it's like to be Schizo!
Oh and Dave, if your fiance looks anything similiar to the girl they stood next to me....you can do better. Mingin'!
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 14:13, Reply)
Cannot be arsed to scroll through all sixteen pages of answers on here but has anyone written an amusing tale of taking the wrong blonde girl home from a holiday in Portugal yet? If not then tis a sad day indeed..

Onto other things, I was working as a charity fundraiser in Wigan or somewhere equally hellish with someone who the chavs constantly shouted 'BOB MARLEY! HAHAHA!!!!' at.

Problem was (apart from him being quite, quite dead) was that she was a) female b) blonde and c) whiter than Milky McMilk from the Milky Way.

She did have dreads though so you know, I could see where they were coming from, the sub human one eyed 7 fingered inbred drooling simpleminded spasticated wank sock fuckdingles.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 14:11, Reply)
Dylan Moran
Dylan fucking Moran.

And Harry Potter on various occasions.


That's my cherry popped, I hear it gets better the more you do it.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 13:56, Reply)
My mate...
Says that, from a side-on view, i look like the Count from Sesame Street. Although i refuse to admit it, i can see the resemblance.

(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 13:32, Reply)
not a specific person but
everytime I went shopping in waitrose after work in a certain shirt / tie combo people would mistake me for an employee and ask me where stuff was.
Yes I know, Waitrose, but the cambridge branch has got top tilltotty and around 4.30pm it is rammed with yummy mummies on the school run.

Apparently I have a passing resembelance to that gaunt thin stupid bloke off of the office and pirate of the caribbean too.

edit: except im starting to get like a fat version of him.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 13:19, Reply)
Not me, my sister-in-law

True story.

Back in the early 70s my sister in law was a professional tennis player (England No.2 at one brief point).

She was in a lift in a hotel in New York when someone said to her, "Hey Billie-Jean [King] can I have your autograph?" ... well she did look a bit like her.

My sister in law, with a smile on her face, duly obliged, and the autograph hunter left the lift.

Who was she travelling in the lift with? - yep - Billie-Jean King!

Cue laughter.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 13:19, Reply)
Seth Armstrong and Arthur Mullard
Years ago, I used to live in Northolt West london, and I used to frequent a pub called the Plough. A couple of the regulars there were the spitting images of Emmerdales Seth Armstrong and cockney fat-bloke Arthur mullard. I believe that the Seth character actually died in the pub and was sat propped up at a table for hours before anybody noticed.

that is all, small penis.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 12:38, Reply)
I'm a big chap, and at one point I used to have a big black beard...Any way, during this beard period, I went to see a comedian in a pub, whilst wearing a white & navy blue horizontal striped t-shirt. About halfway thru the act I stood up to go to the bar, only to have the comedian say..

"OI ! Are you that guy whos' been fucking Popeye's wife ?!?!"

I sat back down VERY quickly
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 12:35, Reply)
A local post for local people...
I have a female friend who constantly gets mistaken for Tubbs off the League of Gentlemen.

I've also, when very, very drunk, gone up to some random bloke in Scruffys in Brum thinking it was my mate Jez and proceeded to question him at length about his band. When I didn't get a response I called him a miserable sod, only for him to turn round and say "I'm not Jez". I felt like a right tit.

No apologies for length. It was enough to pop my cherry...
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 12:32, Reply)
danny from pop stars
I got free chips and cheese from the Tasty Tattie in Aberdeen by pretending to be Danny from Pop stars. And was served by the doppelganger of Des Lynam . Sadly, I got in a fight and was banned from the afore mention eatery and I was lead out with Des Lynam shouting “leave it Danny, you’ve got a career to think of”. Danny, where ever you are and if your reading this, go to the tasty tattie in Aberdeen and revel in the glory of being recognized again. And prove that Des Lynam was wrong too! Double whammy, pure and simple, big guy, pure and simple.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 11:55, Reply)
then followed that up by being misidentified and taken. Went home with a right good time girl. fun!
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 11:48, Reply)
One of my mates looks like Jesus, or so people shout at him. I never knew Jesus was a ginger with generally Nordic features and an Inverness accent.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 11:47, Reply)
no not really...at a party few summers ago. Guy comes up to me - "Hey - you're wino.nz aren't you? You're a wanker blah blah blah..." turns out I pissed him off at another party years earlier when he was a teen. No recollection of him whatsoever so fuck him.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 11:42, Reply)
Prince Harry
Some people say I look a lot like prince Harry, which I guess is true because every time I go to London I have groups of people looking at me and pointing. It is bloody funny to give them the royal wave and see them go nuts.

Just to clarify, I'm not Prince Harry!
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 11:41, Reply)
Went round Ikea in a blue T shirt
Elderly gent comes up and asks whether I know if they were going to open up more of the tills at the checkout I politely say I don't know. He gets a bit annoyed at me. I get annoyed at him expecting me to know things about the inner workings of Ikea and say "Well, I don't work here!" sharply back to him.
He says "oh, don't you? Sorry" and leaves me alone.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 11:38, Reply)
Been mistaken a few times...
Not actually mistakes, but I've been told that I used to look like Nicholas Lyndhurst. One security guard where I work even used to call me Dave. He got the hint when I started to ignore him.

I've also been mistaken for someone who worked in Debenhams. Not quite sure why, as I have never worked for Debenhams. In fact, at the time, I was at school, and didn't have a Saturday job.

And, I've been mistaken for someone who gives a fuck.

Actuall, I have an ex-girlfriend who, for some reason, was always mistaken for a copper when she was driving. Just because she tended to drive around in a White blouse, and drove a very light blue (almost white) Astra, people assumed she was a member of the law.

Admittedly, It was great fun when she used to drive up behind people, then flash her lights and indicate they pull over.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 11:19, Reply)
I accidentally went and saw 'Waterworld'

because I saw the poster and thought it was Kevin Costner the good filmmaker, who did 'Dances With Wolves' - rather than the other Kevin Costner, the bloated victim of his own publicity.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 11:10, Reply)
Similar thing to never-right
In WH Smiths one day to buy summat, happened to be wearing a suit and tie, was stopped by a posh-ish lady asking where something was.

Had a vague idea where she needed to go though and it doesn't hurt to help, "I'm sorry I don't work here but if you go to the....", didn't get any further before the divvy trout snapped back "Well why not?" with a face like thunder.

Have thought of a million hilarious sarcy replies since then but could only stand and gawp at the time before she stormed off muttering about people's attitudes these days.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 10:32, Reply)
Lorraine Kelly
... I was sixteen at the time. I was not amused.

However, back in the old hometown of Norwich I regularly got called "Joanne". Several sightings of me were seen over the city, even my best friend mistook this girl for me.

The pinnicle of this was in the heady delights of Ritzy's nightclub when I was confronted by a chap who was apparently in love with me. Gropings ensued, and until he called me Joanne I thought nothing of it. What the hell, I was 4 Smirnoff Mules to the wind and a good time was had by all.

So if your name is Joanne, you are from Norwich, have a slight resemblence to Lorraine Kelly and get called "Ruth" by random strangers - I am very sorry. Please feel free to fondle any of my exes, in fact, if you meet a lad called Jamie, could you get back my Dookie CD, the wanker has kept hold of that since 1997 and I'm too tight to by another copy. Thanks.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 10:26, Reply)
I have black hair (short, not in a kind of bowl cut)
I have a scar on my forehead but it's very small and you'd have to be less than a few feet away to see it
I wear glasses but not black, not round, not big thick frames
I do not wear a scarf, I do not carry a broomstick, I do not have a fucking great big white owl on my shoulder

and yet
I'm walking down the street and someone takes the time to hang out of their car window as they drive past and shout "OI FUCK OFF YOU HARRY POTTER BASTARD" at me
but it was alright, once I got over the shock I cast excrucianus on him

length? it's about 8 inches and has a phoenix feather in it
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 10:15, Reply)

About 5 years ago at uni, I was minding my own business in the uni club attempting to drink my own body mass in gin, when a drunken lad wandered up to me.

"It's LIZ! Look at this lads!" he called over to his equally shitfaced friends. They dutifully wander over.

"LIIIIZZZ! How are you!? Why are you here! Where's the cameras?"

My name is Katie.

As a tall confused-looking brunette I don't get mistaken for Hollywood greats very often. Thinking they surely must be media students who, after watching the creme de la creme of film history, have somehow in their drunken state mistaken me for an early Liz Taylor, or even Liz Hurley (well she was in Austin Powers 1), I enquired as to whom they thought I was.

"Liz! Liz Barker! You know!"

"Off Blue Peter!"

Bah. Students. Get a job.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 10:14, Reply)
four people in a club one night approached me demanding drugs,
i apparently was a dead ringer for a well known and disliked local source of crack.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 10:10, Reply)
Many years ago
I was waiting for the school bus and a dog mistook me for the lampost I was standing near too.....for those who don't know, dog piss really does stink!
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 10:02, Reply)
a former colleague would always get stopped at customs
and thoroughly searched - bags, pat-down, the lot
until the Gibraltar IRA shootings, when suddenly he could travel unmolested.
Turns out he had the same name as one of the IRA terrorists that got shot dead.
(, Tue 5 Jun 2007, 9:55, Reply)

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