I am genuinely curious. Why would you remove your genitals? Did your Daddy touch them and make you feel funny when you were a kid?

(Legless is a prick., Fri 14 Sep 2012, 9:14, 1 reply)

Do you generally find that this kind of thing works on people with a mental age above 12?
Because I genuinely haven't heard such a pathetic taunt since junior school. You'd lose a battle of wits with my six year-old nephew, mainly due to his cunning use of the rhetorical "I know you are, but what am I?" tactic.

Then again, he cries about being put on the nawty step too :)
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 9:25, closed)

Did you cry when Daddy used to touch your winky? Or did he just make you suck his?

(Legless is a prick., Fri 14 Sep 2012, 9:27, closed)

Isn't it amazing how you can recognise the traits?

(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Fri 14 Sep 2012, 9:32, closed)

I think it's kinda sad
Their natural home would be 4chan but they hang out here because they're too shit-scared of the big kids to leave their tiny little corner of the playground. Mainly because 4chan would eat them for breakfast, shit them out and then piss on them for good measure. It's far easier for them to thrash about on here and then go on facebook saying "LOL I dun trolled b3ta!"
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 9:55, closed)

Deep breath, Emv.
It'll be alright.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 10:30, closed)

Ah, a slight variation on the classic "You're upset!"
From "Trolling for dummies", chapter 1, page 1
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 10:41, closed)

you always come out on top in these encounters Emvee, that's what I like about you
if only your dad was around to share these moments with you
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 10:44, closed)

aaaand we're back to square one
nice of you to join us Rory, but Shed already did the dad material in this thread
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 10:54, closed)

Wait?
So Rory is off the step?
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Fri 14 Sep 2012, 10:59, closed)

I'm assuming someone forgot to put the brake on his wheelchair

( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 11:08, closed)

GOOD JOKE!!!!!!! I GET THIS!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 12:10, closed)

How's your daughter, Monty?
www.b3ta.com/questions/mosthaunted/post1728566
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 12:18, closed)

There's always some weird reason as to why a grotesque man with a penchant for dressing like a twelve year old and with a sexual fetish about kids toys 'enquires' about other peoples kids

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 12:41, closed)

I'm just a concerned citizen
After all, he's shown strong noncing tendencies, it's no wonder her mum wouldn't let him see her
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 12:46, closed)

He's not really a nonce though is he Emvee; beginners he don't dress like a twelve year old with waki t-shits and skate boi shit and all that crap, nor worryingly does he devote his time to sexualising childrens toys
The only nonce in this particular thread apart from ringofyre is you, you mischievous scamp. I sware though, if I even saw you within five feet of my kids I'd do time.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 12:53, closed)

Aw, does your kids' slag mum not let you see them either?
I knew there was a reason you were on here so much. You seem to be getting a little upset.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:01, closed)

GOOD ONE!!!
HE'S ON THE ROPES, EMV!!!!!!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:05, closed)

FATHERS 4 JUSTICE!
and noncing our own kids
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:06, closed)

I'M WARNING YOU, SERIOUSLY I KNOW WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE EVEN WHEN YOU'RE NOT WEARING A BALLOON AS A DISGUISE
STAY AWAY FROM PEOPLES KIDS AND STOP ASKING ABOUT FORUM POSTERS KIDS, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU'RE SAT IN YOUR LONELY FINSBURY PARK BEDSIT WITH YOUR PANTS ROUND YOUR ANKLES YOU GROTESQUE MAN
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:06, closed)

Definitely UPSET

( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:07, closed)

BAM!!! SUPLEX!!!!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:09, closed)

IM ALWAYS UPSET WITH PEDERASTS
ITS JUST A BIT OF FUN TO YOU, YOU'VE GOT NO DAD YOU DON'T CARE, WE'RE TALKING ABOUT YOUR SEXUAL LUST FOR PEOPLES CHILDREN HERE
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:17, closed)

Hahahahahaha
stop crying Rory
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:19, closed)

POW!!!! HALF NELSON!!!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:20, closed)

I knew I'd seen this face creeping round the bushes in Finsbury Park
www.flickr.com/photos/james_godwin/5772615168/
PURE PEEDO
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:23, closed)

Fucking hell proper Child-catcher job innee.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:25, closed)

Obviously.
In a photo, taken in a pub, at a party, with only adults present.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:28, closed)

I didn't think it was possible to look both sinister and creepy
AND like special needer who's just wet himself, at the same time.

How'd you do it?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:32, closed)

Christ, look who's talking
That moustache makes you look like a retarded Chuckle brother
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:45, closed)

KAPOWWWW!!!! ANOTHER STRIKE FOR THE EMV-MEISTER!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:49, closed)

totes

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:28, closed)

Good luck with your next attempt to see your kids

( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:28, closed)

OOOF!!!! PILEDRIVER!!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:29, closed)

It's more amusing when I post your picture, not some rubbish from google
People in the North London area know who to look out for when they're dropping their kids off at nursery, or more importantly down Finsbury Park
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:31, closed)

Aw, poor angry little shouty man
can't touch his own kids
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:39, closed)

BLAOWWW!!! UPPERCUT!!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 13:42, closed)

I like these,
but it's no JMG.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 14:20, closed)

Looks like a cunt, acts like a cunt. So guess what?







You're definitely a cunt.
(Legless is a prick., Fri 14 Sep 2012, 16:29, closed)

I am genuinely a bit worried about you m8.
There are people you can talk to, you know - you don't have to do this alone.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 12:55, closed)

Nah it's been great
I've learned so much today about the terrible effects preventing a father from touching his kids can have on a man's mental health, but at the same time gained a valuable insight into why the mothers do it. It's been educational, thanks.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 14:17, closed)

SHAZAM!!!! CLOTHESLINE!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 15:12, closed)

I also just found a photo of Rory
I think I've actually ruptured something laughing

Sorry, lemme get this straight, the nonce who criticises my fashion sense for wearing a T-shirt with a swear word on it goes out in public with a circled "A" drawn on his head in blue pen? Are you fucking shitting me?



Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Is it my birthday or something?
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 15:18, closed)

That isn't Rory you oaf.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 15:42, closed)

Your chum Lord Scrope uploaded it
Rory didn't deny it
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 15:47, closed)

You witless turd.
Imagine, right – just imagine – someone finds a picture of a complete spastic and uploads it to the internet, claiming it’s a picture of someone else, for a joke. Can you imagine that? You can imagine having sex with a robot car so surely this is something you can grasp, no?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 15:51, closed)

I'm genuinely curious
What was it that first attracted you to your daughter's slaggy, layabout, crackhead mother?

And at what point did you decide she'd be the perfect mother for your precious widdle child?
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 16:02, closed)

BOOM!!!!!! LEG DROP!!!!!!!
I'm going to need you to shut up soon, I'm running out of wrestling moves.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 16:14, closed)

also
KERPLOWIE!!!!!NECKBREAKER!!!!!!!!!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 15:43, closed)

Dude,
Don't get wound up by this - you're being baited by a comedy account known as 'shed'. It's like the ghosts in this week's QOTW - if you ignore them , they will go away (you don't have to use ignore 2.0 - what I mean is, don't let it all get to you so much).
(Jimbojames Wishing every day could be like today, Fri 14 Sep 2012, 15:46, closed)

I am not a 'comedy account'.
I'm not amusing enough.
(Legless is a prick., Fri 14 Sep 2012, 16:30, closed)