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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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One day, 'Swipe, I'll sit you down and tell you tales that will explain somewhat why I'm like this.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 15:57, 1 reply, 15 years ago)
when i have finished this couple of months of hell
and you have finished that essay, we can go for many drinks in that 'spoons with the amazing toilets on chancery lane.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 15:58, Reply)
Sorry, what?
there's a Spoons in Britain with amazing toilets?
(berk, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:00, Reply)
Oh you have no idea. I'll take pictures.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:01, Reply)
I await them with bated breath...

(berk, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:03, Reply)
The ones on google images don't do them justice. I could quite happily live in them.
The whole pub's pretty good, actually. I don't know why I didn't think of a Spoons breakfast post-bash.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:04, Reply)
bated breath you say.
Have you tried Listerine?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:05, Reply)
seriously
they keep winning "best loo in london" award. you wash your hands in a motherfucking fountain, ffs. a FOUNTAIN.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:08, Reply)
GUESS WHERE I'M GOING TONIGHT

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:01, Reply)
Ooooh DO TELL.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:02, Reply)
Oh, sorry, forgot to say, the venue's changed
it's now in Collier's Fucking Wood.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:03, Reply)
Is this a joke?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:03, Reply)
Yes, yes it is.
Why the fuck any of us would go to Collier's Fucking Wood is entirely beyond me. It was a vain attempt to get rid of you.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:05, Reply)
Crow made me go to a pub there once.
Middle of fucking nowhere and all the drinks were brown*


*I now have 'California Dreaming' in my head. Curse my 'word association' brain.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:06, Reply)
I know, if you recall correctly the "Collier's Fucking Wood" quote was from you
spoken at the Chandos, the night I punched you.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:08, Reply)
Ah, was it?
My eyes are dim, my back is bent, my limbs have atrophied.

I cannae remember, mon.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:10, Reply)
How much do you know about Virgil and post-Christian interpretations?

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:11, Reply)
Fuck all I fear. Sorry.
Post-Christian shit is not my bag.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:20, Reply)
Too much to hope for :(

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:33, Reply)
TIMMY MALLET FUCKING YOUR CRANIUM

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:08, Reply)
Mustn't pause, mustn't hesitate, look at Bobby and go "bleurgh!"

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:09, Reply)
What the fuck are you on, No-el?

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:10, Reply)
It hurts me that this is probably well before your time.

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:12, Reply)
I am quite young.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:14, Reply)
I think it finished in 1992.

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:15, Reply)
Rather like me.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:25, Reply)
At least I was alive then

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:34, Reply)
I could legally drink in pubs in 1992.
Got that makes me feel old.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:36, Reply)
Well, at least it was the drinks and not the clientele.

(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:13, Reply)
POTD

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:24, Reply)
Those Collier's.
They'd do anything.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:04, Reply)
*would* though

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:04, Reply)
Down in my estimation?
Hell in a handcart?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:03, Reply)
For a piss on Chancery Lane?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:03, Reply)
For a piss UP.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:03, Reply)
To film "ANAL LEGENDS 6 - LAMPITO TAKES 2"

(Bazongaloid, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:04, Reply)
Lord of the 'rings' - the Poo Towers

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:08, Reply)
The Fat and the Furious (Anal Pounding)
Featuring solid brown rims.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:10, Reply)
'Bottom Live'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:11, Reply)
I love this
Just think of all the jokes you can cram in about car modding. Slamming, poke, stretch, boot installs. There's pun potential aplenty.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:25, Reply)
Will you recreate the Disney classic 'The Black Hole'?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:10, Reply)
It'll be like the Sorcerer's Apprentice
Except instead of anthropomorphic brooms, it's men lining up to do me, and the floor will be awash with come and enema juice instead of mopwater.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:13, Reply)
This is DYNAMITE.
We'll clean up at the Porn Oscars with this one.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:21, Reply)
Judging by the 'size' of some of the actors,
less Dynamite than Dyno-rod...
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:22, Reply)
I hope you'll clean up the floor long before the awards get handed out.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:23, Reply)
I hate the smell of santorum in the evenings.

(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Wed 5 Jan 2011, 16:25, Reply)

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