*sighs*
Yes.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:28, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

We have our supplier.
The next case for the Playground Court is "Billy v's My Friend" - Plaintiff has filed a complaint of defamation of character regarding his ten foot willy.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:35, Reply)

Defamation of character? Hardly.
It's the charge of public indecency that I'd fight.

She was gagging for it, y'honour.
( Kroney, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:37, Reply)

Grounds for assault?
She hit it with a rake. Is that "reasonable force"?

It's a matter for the courts to decide.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:39, Reply)

Frankly I think that the witness is unreliable
By dint of mistaking said member for a snake. Clearly this is unlikely in the extreme and calls into question the veracity of her entire testimony.
( Kroney, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:41, Reply)

I believe the next case centres around attempts by the municipal waste collection authority
to prevent my father (or "old man" as he is commonly referred) from wearing his uniform whilst attending sporting events.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:46, Reply)

Surely it's a charge of common assault against "the girl next door"
who, upon being shown said appendage, hit it with a rake.

The defendant contests that upon first seeing the appendage she believed it to be a snake.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:40, Reply)

curse my slow fat fingers.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:42, Reply)

It depends if the story is true
"My Friend" could just be spreading lies about Billy exposing himself to the girl next door.

If so...defamation? Slander? If written on the walls in the bogs, libel?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:42, Reply)

And also regarding the assault on the plantiff by the respondant, allegedly using a garden implement
after an ophidia/genitalia confusion, resulting in 47% reduction in said willy length
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:41, Reply)

good god.
leave the legal speak to the lawyers you lot, eh??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:51, Reply)

Sorry, i'll stick to what i'm good at
*sweeps floor*
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 20 Jan 2011, 12:59, Reply)