I've been on a mission on mercy TD
GreatAuntDogFucker called me in all of a flap as she'd been sent some 'official looking' documents asking her to send in her gold jewelery in exchange for a GREAT PRICE.

She doesn't need the money, likes the lumps of gold she has and wants to keep them, but at the age of 89, she was a bit confused by the whole thing.

She is no longer confused, her valuables remain hers and everything is well with the world.

And she made me a cup of tea.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:31, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Next time I write to her
I'll tell her that you're a fraud and a charlatan and not her nephew at all.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:34, Reply)

Don't do that.
She is old and frail.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:37, Reply)

I'll have mercy
I'll stick to my usual alias of a deposed Nigerian prince, just needing $6000 in order to clear my name and release untold riches which I will share with you.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:40, Reply)

Really TD?
How can I get this money to you? It sounds like a deal where neither of us can lose!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:41, Reply)

I guarantee it!
And I'm a man of my word.

Just send $6000 (I'll take £100 if you're strapped) to Exiled Nigerian Prince, C/O The Disappointed, Bradford.

Used notes, if you'd be so kind.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:46, Reply)

The bank is closed at the moment.
But I'll get you your $6000 tomorrow and send it straight to you. Although it'll be second-class mail as I'm a bit strapped at the moment.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:48, Reply)

If you just e-mail me your bank account details
Including passwords, you can have a nice sleep-in.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:50, Reply)

Gaz is being really slow....
We'll pick this up tomorrow!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:58, Reply)

I have some relatives in the St Pauls area
Who could escort you to the bank if you wished. Or even if you didn't.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 22:07, Reply)

St Pauls isn't too bad these days.
The double-mentals are all living in Easton.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 22:11, Reply)

did you only notice the cup of tea once you had finished a mightily satisfying wank?
because that would make a hilarious anecdote.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:37, Reply)

hahaha
No. Although I wish I'd thought of telling the story that way.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 27 Jan 2011, 21:38, Reply)