Albert Fish, Hitler, Hendrix, Timmy Mallett.
One boy in my tutor group was caught wanking – in a lesson.
The same lad and another boy were caught in the lavatories playing ‘firemen’ with their snorkel jackets done up to the top.
There was also a smelly boy called Michael Green who was, effectively, Danny Kendall. He’d been booted out of all the other local schools and soon left ours, after he punched the Head of Music (a great public service: the man was a fucking cunt who said ‘liddle’ instead of ‘little’ and accused boys of ‘pradding around’. He wore a dove-grey leather blouson), kicked the French doors of the music room open and ran off across the field. Every overlooking window was filled with cheering boys.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:27, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

You are Michael Green
AICyou'reaBennyontheloose
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:28, Reply)

I barely said two words at secondary school.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Why not?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:32, Reply)

Mouth full of cock

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:33, Reply)

Pfft.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:34, Reply)

I was smart enough to realise
that knowing the answers and piping up with them in class was a surefire route to bog-washes. My brother explained how things worked before I started.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:39, Reply)

There was a boy called Adam Light who was bullied for five years
on a daily basis because of the first two words he uttered at school: his own name. He was asked by a teacher what his name was and he replied ‘Adam Li-ight’ in a ‘gay’ way. That was it – five years of taunting. He’s probably ‘done a Moaty’ by now. He was obsessed with horror films.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:37, Reply)

A lad with the hilarious name of Paul Dumper
once called Mr Davies 'a fucking Jew'. Mr Davies was indeed a fucking Jew.
He also piped up in maths 'Sir! Sir! That's a rather gay watch you have on'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:30, Reply)

And was the watch in question bent?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Yes. Slimline digital, in gold.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:37, Reply)

Ahh... The days of the hourly chime.
And setting your alarm off so it went off during assembly.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 11:40, Reply)