He is though.
I am too boring, shy, inexperienced etc etc etc to make him happy.
(berk, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:04, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

And he's too ignorant, touchy and sensitive to make you happy.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:05, Reply)

But when he's not being a douche
he's awesome.
(berk, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:08, Reply)

you know when victims of domestic violence don't press charges
And say, but he loves me really, he just gets angry!

Yeah I totally just compared your situation to that of a battered spouse.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:13, Reply)

or the other way (the right way) of looking at it
Is that he's too much of a cunt for you, and you're better off without his pissy fits and immature behaviour.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:06, Reply)

this
I'm starting to understand why my roommates wife left her.
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:13, Reply)

are gay people allowed to get married in virginia?
That's very progressive. I approve
(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:15, Reply)

no, they're not
they just called eachother wife
do you know how many times i've had to hear "I JUST WANT MY WIFE TO COME HOME!"??????????????
fuck sake get a grip already
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:16, Reply)

Oh :(
You should make her have a jar and every time she says the "W" make her put a buck in the jar (yeah, check me out with my yankee slang terminology)
(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:24, Reply)

I just may do that.

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:29, Reply)

- engross yourself in interesting subjects e.g. read interesting fact and fiction books, listen to interesting music, watch interesting films and plays, keep yourself informed of current affairs. You're guaranteed to be able to talk to someone about a subject that interests them, which, if we're being honest is selfishly all anyone wants.
- put yourself in positions that scare you e.g. complaining politely about poor service, going up to strangers with questions, socialising at parties with people you don't know. Shyness is simply not having the confidence to be outgoing because of a lack of practice of being outgoing. It's soon overcome.
- watch pornography. It's aimed almost exclusively at men and opens a disturbing window into the mind of the average bloke. But it lets women know what we're secretly after. Use the confidence gained from point 2 to master point 3.

Sorted. b3ta: self help and life coaching skills for the damned.
( djtrialprice, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:17, Reply)

I'm all over point three like a rash.
It didn't help with points 1 or 2 when I tried to introduce myself to people at parties and talk about porn.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:25, Reply)

I have never watched porn
trufax.
(berk, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:25, Reply)

When there are more holes in the plot line than in the women, then I'd rather switch on Come Dine With Me.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:27, Reply)

Hahahaha!
The voiceover guy on Come Dine With Me is probably better, too.
(berk, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:29, Reply)

PornHub
Go on. Join the rest of the internet losers. Just keep telling yourself, "This is educational."
( djtrialprice, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:29, Reply)

Pfft.
Maybe. I am mildly concerned it will be weird, though.
(berk, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:30, Reply)

I don't watch it
so you're in good company. As for insight into men, if that was what all men were like I'd become asexual
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:32, Reply)

a sexual what?

(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:34, Reply)

just asexual
means I wouldn't have sex with anyone
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:35, Reply)

Yes. I know.
I was merely making a terrible joke.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:38, Reply)

I'm not saying it's what men are like
For example, pornography contains 0% sensual, respectful love making. That's not to say that men don't really enjoy that but they probably do it in real life anyway. Porn is about escapism and is by definition unrealistic. I'm not advocating that's how it should be done, just pointing out that it reflects what is considered to be the average male idea of fantasy.
( djtrialprice, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:40, Reply)

This is very true.
I mean, without porn, I'd have never considered growing a moustache getting a perm and becoming a plumber.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:42, Reply)

click

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:53, Reply)

This is one argument
I'm definitely not having! I'm sure my views are contrary to most people
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:44, Reply)

What are your views?

(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:46, Reply)

Not ones I'm willing to be mocked for

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:48, Reply)

Are you totally against any porn
in any way shape or form? That's not a view you would be mocked for.
Your views on the AV referendum, that's something I will argue with you about, but anyones view on porn is their own business.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:52, Reply)

I'm not against porn at all
what people watch is their own business. I do find the preponderance of porn based around humiliation, sexual abuse and violence, disturbing and think people need to realise how damaging the porn industry is to the actors as well
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 14:01, Reply)

www.minghella.com/wp-content/gallery/sitephotos/parmav.jpg
( djtrialprice, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 14:02, Reply)

Quite

(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 14:06, Reply)

I disagree about you being contrary
I'd hope most people's reactions to seeing porn for the first time is shock i.e. that's not how it is in real life! I can't remember, was it al (al of all people) who was saying recently access to that kind of thing would worry him as a dad? Kids shouldn't grow up thinking it's normal because it's not.
( djtrialprice, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:54, Reply)

Yes it was me
I'd be horrified if any child of mine went into the world thinking that the stuff you see in porn was in any way normal.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:56, Reply)

Are you answering as Lampito or Al?

( djtrialprice, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:27, Reply)

:/
I'm sorry to hear about your situation, berk. Hope things sort out and you enjoy Croatia.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:31, Reply)