It's not reeeeally SFW
but google 'alien slut mom loves human cock' and look at the first item on the menu. It will sate your need for ENTERTAINMENT and, conceivably, put you off food until you can get your pie-crazed arse to a pie-shop.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 17:40, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I don't care if it's NSFW, there's no-one else here
Sadly the firewall does
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 17:42, Reply)

Only nine minutes more
pretending to work... Oooh, eight now. Nearly the witching hour... but have run out of tonic. What on earth can I have with my gin?
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 17:53, Reply)

More gin. And some lime cordial and ice.
Gimlet ahoy!
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 17:58, Reply)

I've only got:
orange juice,(formerly) fizzy mineral water and milk. Looks like it's going to be a Screwdriver minus the vodka but with a twist of gin.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 18:01, Reply)

Proper gangsta that, gin and juice. I like the way you roll.

(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 18:03, Reply)

Oh, is it?
Ah, well. There's my excuse, bruh. I've always found rum a more agreeable accompaniment to juice but we must move with the times, I suppose.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 18:09, Reply)

Ice.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 18:01, Reply)

I would, Monty, I really would
but the ever-watchful eyes of my wife would quickly pick up on it and entirely fair (but nonetheless hurtful)accusations of alcohol-dependence bandied about.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 18:05, Reply)

I don't think I shall do this at work, Bara my dear boy.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 17:42, Reply)

No, you'd be well advised not to.
Unless of course you work in the sex-industry. What do you 'do', Monty? I'm in recruitment. It's too dreary for words.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 17:47, Reply)

I manage a web and catalogue operation selling storage systems and furniture.
Dull as ditchwater a lot of the time, but it's a job and boy do I need one...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 17:59, Reply)

God, this money business is a ball-ache.
Can't we all just wipe the slate clean and start again?
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 18:02, Reply)

Vile, isn't it?
I was raised to believe commerce was vulgar - I made the ridiculous error of telling my employer that this was how I felt, once.

Wot a fackin idiot, eh readers?

I am off home now, so I bid you a fond farewell, my good man.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 18:04, Reply)

Fare thee well.

(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 18:06, Reply)