Spiffing.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 11 Oct 2011, 22:50, 1 reply, 14 years ago)

I expect you to be a top bounder!
The Chap Olympiad Event List

There are ten events in all and are often chosen close to the big day. Previous events have included:

The Three-Trousered Limbo
Pairs of contestants sharing enormous trousers must wriggle under a steadily lowered pole while 1930s calypso music is played on a gramophone player. The trousers must remain at a discreet level with points deducted for underwear revelation.

Moustache Wrestling

Bounders
Chaps approach a row of ladies and are given two minutes to behave like utter cads. The winner is the bounder who receives the loudest slap accompanied by the wryest smile.

Quill Throwing

Hop, Skip and G&T
Contestants must leap into a sandpit holding a brimming gin and tonic. The remaining liquid in the glass is measured and points deducted for spillages.

Martini Knockout Relay

Cucumber Sandwich Discus
A plate of cucumber sandwiches is hurled across the field, with extra points if the sandwich remains edible.

Umbrella Jousting

Shouting at Foreigners
Contestants must procure gentlemanly essentials, such as kippers or a trouser press, from a shopkeeper with no command of English and few manners.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 22:55, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wy4sMxFxJE8
(berk, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 22:59, Reply)

NSFW
vimeo.com/kuntandthegang/wankfantasy
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:02, Reply)

Me no likey
me infinitely prefer:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=0iRTB-FTMdk
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:03, Reply)

Oh no, Mr B was brilliant live
I like Professor Elemental too, particularly his one about tea, but Mr B is better.

EDIT - although this one you've just linked is superb. Have you seen their chap-off?
(berk, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:06, Reply)

Oh yes.
I am a keen follower of the Chap Hop wars. I agree B has more presence on stage, but I think the professors recorded output is better, also his lyrics are original, while B just does covers(ish).

This is my fave:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCPxNmEWBvI
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:12, Reply)

This is great
but the fighting trousers one was better.
(berk, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:16, Reply)

I would heartily recommend The Indifference Engine as a purchse
It contains those 2 track and Cup of Brown Joy and many other gems. £5 as I recall, downloaded from his website.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:19, Reply)

Similarly, I will recommend Flattery Not Included to you
I shall go and have a mooch for that now.
(berk, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:21, Reply)

Danke
www.professorelemental.com/fr_home.cfm
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:22, Reply)

It seems to be only for men
Edwardian lawn games were mixed :(
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:05, Reply)

Surely you could offer your services to 'slap' bounders who overstep the mark?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:06, Reply)

Strict nanny!

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:10, Reply)

a +u
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:13, Reply)

I like the way you think young lady.
*caddish wink*
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:15, Reply)

it's also a reference to a radio show noone else will remeber

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 11 Oct 2011, 23:16, Reply)