The only date I've been on was a long weekend in Amsterdam.
At one point I was in the toilet of the hotel room having the most noisy, farty dump ever and simultaneously laughing at myself and crying with embarassment knowing she could hear every trumpety fart.
Surprisingly, that was the start of what was a great relationship.

Alt: drowning my sorrows in cheap wine, as usual.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:26, 3 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

I would be utterly mortified.

( Kroney, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:27, Reply)

I think it was the most embarrased I've ever been since I wet myself on a primary school outing when I was three.
I really felt like a character in a crude romantic comedy.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:30, Reply)

be utterly mortified have asked if she minded passing the ice cube tray from out of the fridge, as it had been a 'sloppy one'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:34, Reply)

I've slung a net across underneath the seat
anything too sloppy to get caught isn't fit for task.
( Kroney, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:37, Reply)

Quality control. Like it.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:37, Reply)

+sh

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:47, Reply)

I once split up with a girl because I heard her have a loud shit and it turned me right off her.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:29, Reply)

You are Lloyd Cole AICMFP

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:32, Reply)

I have no idea who that is.
A quick google doesn't explain your comment either.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:34, Reply)

He released a v poor single
the first line of which referred to a lost weekend in a hotel in Amsterdam. Nothing about loud, farty shits though. That's all yours.

He looks just like 'TV funnyman' Jimmy Carr.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:36, Reply)

Another successful music reference!

(PsychoChomp, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:38, Reply)

If you've never heard of Lloyd Cole
I'd pretty much despair of you.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:45, Reply)

Stop causing a Commotion

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:47, Reply)

I like it when he hangs off the clock face.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:49, Reply)

10/10

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 16:09, Reply)

Nope.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:54, Reply)

I will keep doing them. I don't fucking care.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 16:09, Reply)

Ah, I see now.
I think Amsterdam is my favourite place to holiday.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:45, Reply)

I find it rather depressing, personally.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 16:11, Reply)

Jimmy Carr has a FUCKING MASSIVE HEAD
I can confirm this
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 15:48, Reply)