Someone's car has just had its window smashed by a falling tree branch.
The professional wordsmith who is currently working temporarily as a receptionist decided to inform the person with this email.

Subject: Car park, branch
Body: Can the person who owns the car with numberplate xxxxxx please come to reception, something has happened...
(PsychoChomp, Tue 16 Oct 2012, 16:42, 3 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

top work
vague yet menacing.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 16 Oct 2012, 16:52, Reply)

My employer takes on similar fuckwits
We have a secure car park and only certain people and cars are allowed access. Every permitted car has a numbered sticker displayed on the windscreen.

If the security muppets find someone parked in the wrong space, instead of just checking to see which employee has sticker number xxx and contacting them directly, they email everyone in the building instead. That's 500 emails instead of 1. Brilliant.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 16 Oct 2012, 16:52, Reply)

It's OK
One of SEPA's offices is on our business park. There is, no word of a lie, a large yellow sign in the entrance to the car park saying "warning - beware of moving vehicles"

In. The. Entrance. To. A. Car. Park.

This is why, as a country, we're not allowed nice things any more.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 16 Oct 2012, 17:01, Reply)

do you have to pay by the email these days?
bloody political correctness EU recession gone mad
(quintsy, Tue 16 Oct 2012, 17:04, Reply)

Oh Q, I didn't have to expect to spell this out for a man of your calibre
500 people all having to open an email that is only aimed at 1 of them. Bit of a waste of time for the other 499 isn't it?
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 16 Oct 2012, 17:29, Reply)

what? 5 seconds seeing an email they'll just delete
yes that's terrible, i honestly thought you were making a fairly valid comment about taking up room on a mail server

but 5 seconds looking at an email? yaw krazeh, biarch
(quintsy, Tue 16 Oct 2012, 17:35, Reply)

Oh dear Q
This happens several times a day - every day. Gets quite tiresome very quickly.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 16 Oct 2012, 18:09, Reply)

does she have a thing for misusing reflexive pronouns?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 16 Oct 2012, 16:54, Reply)

Who doesn't?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 16 Oct 2012, 16:57, Reply)

myself.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 16 Oct 2012, 17:33, Reply)