you should write a story about him having a wank, that'll learn him

(quintsy, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:43, 3 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

please don't

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:44, Reply)

"...and Naked Ape contorted about the bed as his semi squirted fathoms of white juice all over his He-Man bedsheets, spattering the walls and his signed Jimmy Osmond photo with his fresh, hot semen"

(quintsy, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:46, Reply)

I'd click "I like this" but I don't want to give the wrong impression

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 14:21, Reply)

I'd rather not if you don't mind.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:44, Reply)

Nakers' heavy Neanderthal brow furrowed with concentration,
his tongue hanging out like that of a cross-eyed bulldog locked in a Range Rover on a hot day, whilst his simian digits flailed helplessly around his nipple-sized acorn-cock. He wailed like a Downser with a dropped ice cream as he fumbled gradually towards the balsamics. Grunting with ever-increasing urgency, his over-long hairy arm became a blur, and his bleating hit the upper registers.
Then it all seemed to happen at once, as first a tortured, whining fart and then an oily, otter-like stool flew from his distended anus, splattering every seat within a six foot radius of where he sat on the bus.

'Don't do that, dear', said his mum slash wife, dabbing a foetid mixture of ordure and semen from the back of the man in front's coat. 'It's not your birthday 'til tomorrow'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:48, Reply)

phwoar

(quintsy, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:48, Reply)

well I don't know about you but I could cut glass right now.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:49, Reply)

i like that he added more to it

(quintsy, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:51, Reply)

AND MORE.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:53, Reply)

Like Bravo Two Zero it get's better with every read

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:53, Reply)

Thanks 'Paul Ross'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:54, Reply)

actually i think it was better without the last paragraph

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:54, Reply)

actually fuck off you bent spastic

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:57, Reply)

I will do just that, as i'm off home and to the pub, bye bye

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:59, Reply)

bye bbz x x x x x

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:59, Reply)

*standing ovation*
so to speak
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 26 Oct 2012, 13:50, Reply)