this is one of those rare occasions when neither of those things will help.
Time to put Château Boyce up for sale.

:'(
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:00, 4 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

WTF?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:02, Reply)

Game's up man, can't do this no more.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:03, Reply)

Oh shit...that is bad news. I guess this is to do with your ex getting kicked out

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:09, Reply)

A number of factors.
Looks like a life of renting beckons - but one free from debt so not all bad news.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:12, Reply)

Didn't Rory give you some very sound advice about this the other day?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:13, Reply)

Yeah, 'don't do it' - but I can't do otherwise.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:14, Reply)

No chance of selling and buying a bit further afield?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:17, Reply)

I heard Newgate is nice

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:18, Reply)

Nope, the vast proportion of the not-inconsiderable profit I should make
will go to pay off my debts.

I am going to start looking into valuations today. With a heavy fucking heart.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:19, Reply)

I thought you only had a couple of years till the slate was wiped clean

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:20, Reply)

Three and a half more to go.
And at the end of that I'd be obliged to remortgage and give them all I raise. No provision for inflation - and were I to get a payrise they'd get that too.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:27, Reply)

That is shit news, man.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 31 May 2013, 8:48, Reply)

That's really rather poo news,
when did you buy it? Is there no other options like remortgaging it or anything?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 31 May 2013, 8:58, Reply)

11 years ago.
No chance of remortgaging no, sadly - I am under an IVA.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 31 May 2013, 9:24, Reply)

You've been under this IVA all this time and you've still not managed to conceive.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 31 May 2013, 9:28, Reply)