I like a pub to be at least 70 years old.
I want a seat. I want quick service. I don't want it to be that chain where the standard 5% continental lager is Kronenbourg. I want to be able to talk without shouting, and I want floor-to-ceiling doors (with working locks on them) in the bog cubicles. No BIG SCREEN SPORTS, no oiks. Music I can take or leave.

Ideally I'd also like a pleasant outdoor area/garden overlooking a river.

PS pool, like darts, skittles etc. is for peasants.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 14:44, 5 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

^typical Mince!! *rolls eyes*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 14:45, Reply)

*canned laughter*

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:19, Reply)

You're a flaterrer you really are.
edit: except the river bit.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 7 Aug 2013, 14:47, Reply)

^ this guy, ladies and gennlemen, gets it
Electrickery's gain is publicanism's loss :o(
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 14:49, Reply)

My local is exactly as you described above, and 2 minutes from the train station.
If you come up again, we can sup a lager and dangle our feet in the murky river water and plait each other's hair with daisies and oh it will be so romantic.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 7 Aug 2013, 14:59, Reply)

I will come dressed as a medieval squire.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:00, Reply)

Please don't.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:02, Reply)

But I've ordered the costume already.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:05, Reply)

Alright, just this once.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:07, Reply)

Just don't let him do the silly voice

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:08, Reply)

Look it's not my fault my parents brought me up speaking medieval.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:12, Reply)

Methinks he doth protest too much verily forsooth etc.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:18, Reply)

Aye, tis a truthhood (for the nonce mayhaps) LOL

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:29, Reply)

Agreed. Basically The Wykeham Arms but with a garden.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 14:47, Reply)

ub rostitute
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 14:47, Reply)

It certainly makes running off without paying a lot easier.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 14:49, Reply)

Well
That's pretty dishonest, Monts. I'm pretty shocked if I'm honest.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 14:52, Reply)

I've let everyone down here.
But most of all, I've let myself down.

Well, actually I've let the prostitutes down most of all.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:02, Reply)

billiards man, eh?

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 7 Aug 2013, 15:21, Reply)