I wish to make a complaint.
Enzyme has fucked off on holiday and I'm trying to finish a book chapter that's due tomorrow, and somehow I have managed to write myself into several paragraphs of philosophical musing leading to meandering crap on aesthetics, but now it's too highbrow and pretentious scary for me to deal with and I am totally bluffing, and these people have Humanities PhDs and I'm mostly a scientist, and they're going to rumble me and Kant me in the fuck. Turns out that I made loads of stuff up about realism and some beardy philosopher types had already made it all up before, and now I don't know who to attribute with my ramblings and I need Enzyme. Arse.

Of course, I only have myself to blame as I shouldn't have left it to the last minute, but I still hope it's raining on Enzyme because I had a rubbish holiday and so everyone else should too.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Sun 20 Jul 2008, 22:42, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

no, no, no, no, no, no, no
The word 'holiday' implies relaxation, rest, a general air of laidbackness and perhaps a little laughter. What I got was a week in a camper van with my parents and their two dogs, self-medication with alcohol, sedatives, misery, and a rather low point where I went missing for several hours. Relapse a-go-go.
Edit: and I thought I'd found my first grey hair (MAJOR TRAUMA!) but luckily it was just one that was blonder than the red'uns.
Australia, meh.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Sun 20 Jul 2008, 23:14, Reply)

The great thing about philosophy
is that you can always attribute any bullshitting to interpretation of other ramblings that probably resulted from smoking the funny pipe anyways. This may or may not be an ignorant and arrogant opinion of philosophy lecturers. However, I advise you to just act sincere, and any criticisms can be met with unwavering conviction that they are oh so wrong, and you are the be all and end all of FACT.

I may be slightly drunk, this may be entirely bollocks.

Was the dysfunctional padded camper holiday death making hate trip all the fun that you suggested it could be?
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 0:22, Reply)

Worry Thee Not
Two possible solutions:

1. Send me it (gaz me) and I'll help out if I can (I'm in Hong Kong and bored to tears, and can't run, and am pissed off)

2. Remind yourself quietly (and them LOUDLY) that Humanities PhD = "you want fries with that?" because you, and I, are both scientists and as a consequence TRUE PhDs
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:47, Reply)

If it's any consolation I'm miserable too.
And if Enzyme were here to help you'd only be even more confused than when you started out.

He does tend to call a spade a long wooden cylindrical digging implement with a square metal attachment.
( girlinthehole, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 9:29, Reply)

@MM
I can't even bear to talk about the holiday or I'll cry. I've got 4 days in Milan to un-do the badness, and I've been promised a fishing trip in North Wales to make the pain go away.

Re: the article. It's so very not good, but I am going to pretend it's meant to be that way and that's how we scientists do things. I mean, they want citations as footnotes! Footnotes! And they don't have a LaTeX template. Shocking.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 9:49, Reply)

Footnotes?
My God, they'll be wanting sources next and - gasp! - experimental design!
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 10:09, Reply)

if these people
used BibTeX then the world would be a better place and they could easily have their footnotes instead of a reasonable form of citation such as the Harvard System.
But no.
They want it in Word.
Word.
*is cries*
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 11:07, Reply)

Word?!
FFS, what sort of seat of humanities (you'll note no use of the word "learning" there) is it that you've gotten yourself involved in?
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 13:03, Reply)

^
Well, to be fair, it might be the publisher rather than the AHRC making these demands. But still... no LaTeX.

When I switched to an Arts Faculty from an Engineering Faculty to do my post-doc, people were amazed that a) my thesis was so small and thin (32 000 words but plenty of maths, and I printed double-sided) and that b) I didn't know how to do citations in Word. They were talking about buying Endnote software for the department and I was standing there, laughing, saying "but BibTeX is free!".
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 13:18, Reply)