Saw V - A Review By Kaol
I had no plans last night, so had a few hours of whisky, photoshop and Nick Cave lined up, but fate dealt me the Four of Knives and the Eight of Blood, and I went off to the cinema to see Saw Five.

Now, normally I'd steer well clear of any film that's onto it's fifth sequel, so I went along expecting absolute crap.

It wasn't as bad as I expected.
The thing with films is that if they can make me laugh, then they're onto a winner.

Saw V made me laugh, a lot, for a number of reasons:

1) The acting was appalling. It was like watching a herd of retarded ten-year-olds in a nativity play.

2) The main "good guy" looked exactly like a cut-price version of Nick Cage. Haircut and leather jacket obviously come as standard. And he had a habit of talking to himself. All the fucking time, while almost looking into the camera.
A Shakespearian soliloquy it was not, however.

3) The main "bad guy" looked exactly like a cut-price version of Brendan Fraser, in a suit. He didn't have any particular special skills of note, with the exception of looking shifty and evil.

4) People were messily killed. Always raises a grin for me.

Anyway, onto the bad:

- The plot was awful.
- The film was pretty dull, other than the "trap" sequences. I found myself sitting there, waiting for the next gory bit.
- The ending was predictable.
- It's the fifth film in the sequence, and they've run out of ideas.

The positive:

+ The traps were good fun.
+ Lots of nice gore.

So, I'd say don't bother seeing this film, unless you've got nothing better to do, or you really, really liked the other four.

Really, what they should do is take all the trap-bits from all five films, and make a fantastic compilation, as, to be honest, the plot is pretty crap.

Saw V - 4^1/2 out of 10
( Cawl, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 11:23, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I've never seen any of the Saw films
but the phrase 'a cut-price version of Brendan Fraser, in a suit.' somehow brought visions of mohawks.

I can't think for the life of me why...
( rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 11:31, Reply)

or
watch the cube films.

Have not and have absolutely no urge to watch any of the saw films, however if you do like them then check out

Cube, Hypercube and Cube 0

my little Eye

Series 7, the contenders
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 11:33, Reply)

Cheeky Rubberduck!
I loved the first Saw film, and have seen all the others if only for the traps.

Saw 1 = brilliant.
Saw 2-4 = passable.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 11:46, Reply)

Saw'll I've ever saw of the saw series
Is Saw which I saw on Sawturday.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 12:07, Reply)

...
Sawlly that was sawful
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 12:12, Reply)

stop it
or you will be sawry
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 12:13, Reply)

Cube
rocks. Wasn't so keen on Zero though.


And Kaol, I salute you, I'm a Saw fan but decided not to bother with this one. (Although I wasn't fussed about IV, I watched it again the other night, and it was better than I remembered)
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 12:15, Reply)

I tried to watch Saw 4 a few months ago
I think my brain partly melted due to the awfulness. And it MUST have been bad because I generally like crap films.
(brainwrong, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 13:45, Reply)

I saw Saw.
I watched it because someone said it was good 'n' scary.

/wrong

Won't bother with the rest (although watching them with someone scary might make 'em more fun...Kaol?).
( thealternativefact, Sat 1 Nov 2008, 15:10, Reply)