A story from work
Not mine, but I've heard similar.


OK so this is a true story. We really got this call to my Hospital.

A guys call up and is in a panic. He is literally in hysterics on the phone and we can not understand what he is saying at all at first.

So once he calms down a little this is what he starts to tell us-

"OK so I was in the shower and I was "playing" with my dog (the dog was a Pit Bull). And now he is stuck!"

And the Tech on the line was like what do you mean stuck?

And he goes on to say-

"You know-stuck! He is stuck to my back! What do I do?!"

So the Tech puts the guy on hold and comes to the back where myself and the other techs and the Vet were. She explains what the guy on hold told her. We are all thinking the same thing, but no one wants to say it out loud. So finally the Vet says to her-"OK does he mean that he is naked and the dog has stuck his penis up the guy's asshole and the dog is now erect?"

The tech says to her, that is what I would take it to be. So the Vet gets on the phone. They guy is still there. The first thing that she asks they guy before anything else was-" OK before we goi any further, is this a joke?"

To which the guy replied "NO!"

And between what both the Vet and the Tech that answered the phone said was that unless this guy was an Academy Award winning Actor, he was for real and this was no joke.

So basically the long and the short of the story was that this guy and his Pit Bull were "playing" in the shower (you can draw your own conclusions there, I don't think you need to figure out how the dog's penis got aroused right?) and the dog had humped the guy in the back and was not stuck in the guy's asshole. What was causing the dog to "Stick" to the owner was the "mating tie" that had gone off and was now in the guy.

Totally totally gross.

So the Vet tells the guy on the phone all of this and the guy screams to know that is what is blowing up in his ass, and why he is in so much pain. Basically it was like he had a softball up his ass and it was pulling at his ass crack. The guy asks the Vet how long this will last, when will they get unstuck. And the Vet tells him that it can take up to an hour.

She starts to say to the guy-"When the dog is done-"
Then the guy chimes in with this question-"What do you mean "done"? What do you mean "done"? Do you mean he is gonna blow a load in me!!!!???"

So the Vet had to answer honestly and say yes. GROSS!!!!!!!!!

So after the guy finishes screaming in fear and disgust (which did take a little bit) the Vet said to him-"You may want to go to the Doctor when he is finished (he cried again when she said finished too). You might have some injury there after that."

They guy was not too receptive to that idea at all. He said to her"What do I tell them happened?". The Vet told him that was not her problem, but that he should seek medical attention. She told them that there could be serious bodily injury there. She then asked for his number so she could call back and see how he and the dog were doing. He would not give it to us because he said he was a client at our hospital and didn't want us to figure out who he was by his number. And he said he didn't want us to report him. That's really why we asked for the number, we were going to call animal control on him.

Needless to say he never called back and everyone guy who came in with a Pit Bull ever since we really had to look at and listen to see if we can remember the voice.

LOL

Again weirdest call ever......and it's totally true and sadly was no joke....


Just nasty.....but funny

Can you picture this naked dude with a Put Bull attached to his back hoping around his apartment trying to get from the bathroom to the phone to call us? That must have been a sight to see!
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 5 May 2009, 12:58, 6 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I have a distinct need to ask questions
But I fear I may not wish to know the answers.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 5 May 2009, 13:08, Reply)

If you're going to fuck a pitbull
The shower is the most logical place.
(Dangerous Disco Trev Isn't my real name, Tue 5 May 2009, 13:15, Reply)

What the fuck is a mating tie?
How on earth can..............no don't tell me.
( girlinthehole, Tue 5 May 2009, 13:16, Reply)

well, let's hope
the dog enjoyed himself, and that the situation didn't get *uglier*
( cackers, Tue 5 May 2009, 13:37, Reply)

Uglier
than a pitbull?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 5 May 2009, 13:40, Reply)

uglier
than a (most likely) ugly man being screwed by a pit bull
( cackers, Tue 5 May 2009, 13:44, Reply)