I'll do anything
well not anything. I won't show my tuppence.
I'm constantly pricking about, singing, dancing like a twat instead of dancing nice and alluring in clubs, doing impersonations, broadcasting the details of dates I've been on to anyone who'll listen, doing burlesque courses, being an extra, blah blah. Anything for attention.

I don't want to be 'famous'. Quite the opposite. I want to be a big fish in a small pond and have immediate attention and gratification.
I'm an only child...

But you're only a cunt if people DON'T want you to perform, right? 'Cos my friends and family regularly request stupid things from my repertoire like "Sing us that song!" or "Do your impression of the man from the newsagents!" and I lap it up.

My mother's been calling me Susan Boyle lately. Bitch.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 13:34, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

you sound like a mental

(PsychoChomp, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 13:38, Reply)

I suppose I am
I have never been scared to make a tit of myself or belt out a song in the pub (not on karaoke night either) just to entertain people and boost my ego.
I have few inhibitions.
God I sound like Colin Hunt!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 13:48, Reply)

A little bit yes,
please don't ever sing in public in my presence, I would absolutly hate it.
No offence etc.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 13:51, Reply)

fiiiiiiiirst when there's nothiiiiing but a slooooow glowing dreeeeeam
don't worry. I only do it if I'm asked.
Or if I'm pissed.
Then you can put me in the cupboard so you can't hear me.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 13:54, Reply)

I had to google that lyric,
flashdance...

*head in hands*
(PsychoChomp, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 13:58, Reply)

ah...
you'd prefer showtunes!
*clears throat*
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 13:59, Reply)

you sound like a very camp gay man.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:02, Reply)

STOP STALKING ME!
*glares at roota*
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:02, Reply)

I am exactly like a camp gay man
with a scouse accent.
Except I have boobs and a tuppence.
You're stalking me now pickleperson!!!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:05, Reply)

He's not a person...
He's barely even human!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:13, Reply)

really?
animal, vegetable or mineral?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:15, Reply)

Oooh..
I know what he is!

He is a very model of a modern major general!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:18, Reply)

STOP STALKING ME!
Shal we have our very own Download night - Friday or Saturday, not sure which night i'm allowed out yet
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:19, Reply)

pheasanty plucking
plucker
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:21, Reply)

who me?

( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:25, Reply)

I think I mean both of you
you're carrying on woeful the pair of you.
I don't know whether I'm coming or going.
Nothing new there
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:32, Reply)

Hee hee :0)
Try doing both at the same time
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:36, Reply)

like Schnozzle Durante!
da-daaaah
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:37, Reply)

Sorry fella...
Can't do Friday, got someone coming over.

Saturday I should be free, but I'm skint. What do you have in mind?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:37, Reply)

finding stabby man in the woods

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:37, Reply)

Cocaine, alcohol
The usual for me.

A little tickle and a ruffle for you :0)
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:44, Reply)

Alcohol does sound like a good plan...
Will be able to have a pint or two.

Roota, you can come join us if you can be bothered making the trip!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:47, Reply)

wow
am I being groomed?
I do hope so. It's on my list of overdue rites of passage.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:50, Reply)

*grooms roota*
*rubs thighs*
*dribbles*
*remembers that is now over 30 and should know better*
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:54, Reply)

check!
next on my list are Vegas Wedding and falling in a canal
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 14:55, Reply)

We have canals here
AA is single and might be up for a Vega wedding.
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 15:01, Reply)

get in!
will you marry us dressed as Elvis? I can dress like Katy Perry and AA can dress as Compo from Last of the Summer Shite. Dunno why.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 15:03, Reply)

He's does look a bit like young Compo
I just look sexy but lack the Elvis suit.

I'll do the marriage bit for beer though
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 15:14, Reply)

I'm moving things over to the left.
My head was chocka with all that squashing over to the right. I've got the imprint of the slidey bar thing on my right cheek!

Yay. What beer do you drink? 16 cans enough?
I just looked at AA. He doesn't look like compo. He looks like some butch girl I once 'knew'.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 15:20, Reply)

It's an old pic
He's quite cute in an odd sort of way (my mrs agrees and she has exceptional taste - see profile for proof!), and despite his tender years is quite a good mate.

An 8-pack of Carling would do the job by way of fees.
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 15:27, Reply)

I'm not arguing.
the butch girl was quite the bobby dazzler!
You can have 16 cans. I'll bring lemo and make shandies from some of them. For the toasts after the ceremony. Then I can fall in the canal in my katy perry wedding dress. No, frock. Frock's a better word.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 15:35, Reply)