Why is it that
every cunting time I order food from Tesco, they drive past the window five times before ringing me up bleating that they can't find my flat? With satnav?

This post brought to you by hunger and empty cupboards.
( Maladicta, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 14:39, 16 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

They're going to give me FIVE POUNDS for the spider fiasco.
I'm eating their carbonara now, and it tastes sour, it's horrible.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 14:50, Reply)

A whole five English pounds?
That sounds fair and reasonable to me :) their carbonara ain't great, is it? I've got their steamed Thai green curry in the microwave at the moment and am waiting to see if it tastes of fail...
( Maladicta, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 14:52, Reply)

Yup that's POUNDS STIRLING (or value of up to FIVE POUNDS STIRLING in vouchers).
I might ebay it to see what it'll fetch.

I've moved on to some blue stilton with onion relish on crackers.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 14:57, Reply)

That sounds quite nomsome. I want!
I still can't decide if I think £5 for it is reasonable or not; after all what if you'd been massively arachnophobic, to the point that even the word "spider" makes you shit your pants?

Better idea - try to convince them you bought the carbonara with the voucher!
( Maladicta, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:04, Reply)

I reckon it is...20x the value of the origional product ( approx).
I love a good cheese, there is a place in Borough Market that's amazing.

Hah, I think I've had at least 25% off everything, in vouchers and things marked £0.00.

I think I might celebrate by doubling it and spending it all on shushi one evening.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:08, Reply)

Loooove sushi.
The Yo! Sushi place in St Pancras (where, according to my new discount card the boss gave me yesterday, I get 15% off) fascinates me with its conveyor belt...

When you put it like that, it does sound reasonable to give you a fiver, that's quite a lot of donuts after all! I'd go back there and go a bit mental with sweeties personally...
( Maladicta, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:11, Reply)

Yo Shushi is awesome and evil at the same time.
It's hard to work out exactly how much you've spent, and 10 mouthfulls later, you're £20 down.

But it does taste soo good.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:18, Reply)

The one in Oxford delivers
I've held off so far because it would make my student loan disappear in days...
( Tedium Alduce me to interlow myself., Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:31, Reply)

The £5 is probably "leave us alone" money.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:16, Reply)

I might phone them up in a week and ask them how they're doing, and if they have any plans for the weekend.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:19, Reply)

I've never heard of anyone stalking a mini-market before.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:22, Reply)

No, no, no baby, I was just browsin' in ASDA, it wasn't anything serious.
I didn't mention it because I knew you'ld get like this, why do you always have to be like that?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:23, Reply)

I was chatted up by an over-friendly Aussie customer
who liked the sound of my voice and wanted to add me on Facebook...
( Maladicta, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:24, Reply)

We send "please don't sue us" presents.

( Maladicta, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:24, Reply)

Put a big flashing sign outside saying "tesco person come here"
Or just shoot out the tyres as they drive past
( Tedium Alduce me to interlow myself., Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:30, Reply)

It's a ground floor flat
so I have been known to lean out of the window and yell "oi, come here!". My flatmate has also taken delivery through the windows before...
( Maladicta, Sat 8 Aug 2009, 15:42, Reply)