I'm bored
still no sign of my baby, and I'm starting to think that by the time he's born he'll be ready for school. Luckily I've never heard of anyone who was pregnant NOT having their baby eventually, but I wouldn't be surprised at the moment if I was the first.

any suggestions for how to alleviate the utter boredom of waiting? I've cleaned the house, done lots of baking, eaten a curry and more pineapple than I ever want to see again in my life, and seen all that the shops in my local town have to offer (not a fucking lot).
I've also re read all the books in the house, plus bought several new books and read them. I have yet to resort to daytime TV.

alternatively, did anyone read the copy of Bunty that came free with the grauniad today? how the hell did women in the 70s not go totally mental with that kind of shite 'reading material' on offer?
( ascorbate, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 16:57, 15 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

3mins 3mins

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 16:57, Reply)

Until what
may I query?
(Lord Of Lamb, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 16:59, Reply)

home time
bye losers.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 17:01, Reply)

Light a cigarette
I'm not suggesting you smoke it. It's just that lighting a cigarette makes things happen. Like when you're waiting for a taxi, and you get bored and light a cigarette, a taxi appears. It might trick your body into opening the chute for the babby.

I didn't see the Bunty. I'm hoping there's one left in the shop. Did you see the Jackie on Saturday?? Jeeesus... I really understand my poor mother a lot more now.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 17:06, Reply)

yes
I saw Jackie on saturday - but Bunty is WAY more disturbing - cartoons on testing oven cleaners and doing household chores. Grotesque.

I'm booking appointments to do things all week (hairdressers, meeting friends for lunch, am even contemplating massage) so hopefully baby will make me cancel them. doubt it though. little sod.
( ascorbate, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 17:08, Reply)

If this is any indication of the baby's future temperament...
then I pity you. Imagine trying to get the lazy little divil up for school!

Do you remember the Suzy?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 17:10, Reply)

nope
I only really got the Beano as a kid - because dad wanted to read it...

I'm starting to think that baby will have inherited his father's characteristics of never wanting to be early for anything, and trying not to leave the house for days on end. So long as the little fucker is born sometime soon though, all will be forgiven.
( ascorbate, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 17:15, Reply)

Yeah, cos you have to consider the fact that it's getting BIGGER every day!
Sorry. But it must have crossed your mind.

I used to get the Beano, the Bunty, the Mandy, the Judy and the Suzy. (Mandy & Judy later merged). Then when I got to 11 I started getting the Just Seventeen. When I was 17 I started getting Loaded. These would have cost me a fortune if it weren't for my good old Nana.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 17:19, Reply)

I know!
he's already predicted to be a porker (scan last week said he's a big baby), and although size of baby bears no relation toa mount of pain felt by woman, I just keep seeing babies everywhere and thinking 'fucking hell, look at that head'.

I used to read Just Seventeen and More when I was a teen, but now I'm more likely to read Viz and Good Housekeeping (if only to confuse the person I'm buying them from). I also used to get any horse magazine I could lay my grubby paws on. In fact, I have a copy of Viz in my hospital bag for mr Vit C to read aloud to me in any lulls in proceedings (as if...).
( ascorbate, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 17:22, Reply)

Oh God how could I forget More!
I wasn't very sporty so I used to spend sports day eating cobs and reading More. Ace.

Aw so it's a boy then? Lovely squashy bun-jawed boy. Like a sandbag. I like those.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 17:24, Reply)

yup
at growth scan last week, the sonographer squealed 'look, those are his testicles!', so I'm assuming it's a boy :-) or a seriously deformed girl.

We used to cut out the position of the fortnight in More and stick it on the wall in our 6th year common room. Was hugely amusing until we found the head teacher taking more of an interest in them that most of us did...
( ascorbate, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 17:27, Reply)

Ew to the headteacher
Right I'm off.
I hope your testosterone-packed boy turns up very soon!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 17:29, Reply)

Try having some raspberry tea
you can buy it from a health food shop - it's supposed to evict the little buggers.

I had mine taken out by appointment - they were rather large and jammed by the time they were fully cooked so needed forcible removal via the sun roof.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 18:13, Reply)

been there
done that - it made me chuck, so did evict something. not baby though. I'm not quite at the homeopathy stage yet (in fact, will never be), but am trying various herbal remedies such as clary sage.
thanks for the suggestion though!

(and I thought eastern europeans were supposed to be so punctual too... maybe it's because baby is only half eastern european, he's going for a fashionable lateness?)
( ascorbate, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 18:57, Reply)

Sex sex and more sex
jizz ripens the cervix
or alternatively
get Mr C to twiddle nipples (hard) like there is no tomorrow...

It won't make a difference, but it'll take your mind off it!
(actually nipple twisting releases oxytocin, so it should help - it sure did for Mrs Rabbit)
(CheatingRabbit, Tue 15 Sep 2009, 19:38, Reply)