A face wash with boiling coffee
is usually effective at silencing noisy eaters
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:33, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

Shit on his desk.

(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:35, Reply)

While he's eating.

(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:35, Reply)

then make him eat it.
With chopsticks.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:35, Reply)

The filthy Chinee will gulp it down, making even more disgusting lip-smacking sounds.
They're like that.
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:36, Reply)

'filthy Chinee' replaces 'rammy' as term of the day.
I didn't see that coming.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:39, Reply)

It makes me feel like I'm insulting someone while wearing a monocle and pith-helmet
and drinking a G&T.
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:40, Reply)

I always feel like that.
I honestly do. In my mind I'm in a Jeeves & Wooster story. In reality, it's more Irvine Welsh, unfortunately.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:42, Reply)

Oh, fucking tell me about it.
I should be wearing spats and delivering cutting, off the cuff witticisms. As it turns out, I'm wearing trainer and just saying 'fuck' a lot.
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:44, Reply)

On this front I would very
much like a three piece tweed suit for Christmas
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:46, Reply)

Yes, definitly!
A tweed suit needs a waistcoat.
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:47, Reply)

Me too
I'd like plus fours like Goldfinger's golf outfit, ideally.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:49, Reply)

Bermuda shorts for the upper class

(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:52, Reply)

early B-Boy style

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:53, Reply)

Doing windmills and crazy-legs
to a jaunty 20s jazz tune, while impeccably dressed and wearing a monocle.

All the while, your butler looks on, a tray of martinis at he ready.
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:58, Reply)

sometimes 'I like this' just doesn't cover it

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:59, Reply)

I'm just that good sometimes.

(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 11 Dec 2009, 11:01, Reply)

you're not wrong
I've decided to wear my grey 3-piece to our christmas do. This will mean the potential of photos of me gurning out a guitar solo while immaculately dressed in a well-cut suit.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 11:02, Reply)

If this happens and you don't get pictures
I'll be round your house with a fucking hammer, pal.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 11:06, Reply)

it will happen
and some of my colleagues are so snap happy that there'll more than likely be hundreds of photos to satisfy my terrible terrible vanity.

I'm wondering though, whether to go for white shirt, or black shirt...
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 11:07, Reply)

Black - everyone loves the Oswald Moseley look.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 13:23, Reply)

I sport that look quite a lot
black shirt, brown cords. that's my work outfit.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 13:48, Reply)

Aaaah, I love the smell of casual racism in the morning

(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:42, Reply)

casual is the best
Why dress it up in fancy shoes?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 10:44, Reply)