Cat bites can be dangerous incidentally.
Remind the cunt who is boss, by kicking it in when it least expects it, or put it in a pillowcase and spin it about until it is truly remorseful. Or the non-invasive approach by spraying it repeatedly with a water pistol or just run about wildly, shaking a black bin bag and making stupid noises.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:11, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

At the moment it is only cushions and bin-bags he fears.
I didn't have time in those terrifying seconds...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:12, Reply)

Tumble dryer, 3 minutes, job done.

(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:15, Reply)

You are me
AICMFP
( djtrialprice, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:30, Reply)

Or pretend to be a dinosaur
That'll teach the cheeky little sod.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:13, Reply)

This sems like a good option

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:19, Reply)

Even the lairiest of cats
will bow before Rootasaurus Rex.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:21, Reply)

Rootasuarus Rex sounds like

a gay man with a dinosuar fetish!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:23, Reply)

Yeah,
but Rootasaurus Regina just sounds like a medical condition
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:24, Reply)

ew

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:28, Reply)

If only

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:23, Reply)

Work on your roar.
And hold your arms up like little T-Rex arms. If the cat laughs, your roar isn't scary enough.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:25, Reply)

I actually did the arms thing unprompted in the office before you said it.
Dare me to roar?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Feb 2010, 11:28, Reply)