Unexpected Nudity - part.2. For part 1 see Top Tips.
Yesterday afternoon I had some leaflets to deliver (election material: I think politics has no place on OT so I won’t say which party. But it wasn’t the thieving scum bag Tories).
I weaved my way round several cars on one drive and then almost stepped on a near naked bint sat on the doorstep.
From the waist down she was sat in a sleeping bag, from there on up she was wearing a bra that was clearly at least one size too small. The sun was shining, so I can only think she was soaking it up – but the temperature was near zero.
She was smoking – in two different senses of the word – and jabbering on the phone in forrin. She did look up and say ‘Hi’ with a lovely smile. I replied politely and tried hard not to stare at her skin. It was sooo smooth and milky, and completely unblemished. The softest, smoothest skin I have ever seen.
Now if Spanky had been there he would surely have pulled out his todger and spluffed one out over a body like that. Being a gentleman I naturally walked on where he would have wanked on. However, what I can’t explain is why she didn’t have any goose bumps. I was all but shivering in my thermals while she sat as alabaster in the winter sun.
Go figure.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 8 Mar 2010, 9:50, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

No, if Spanky had been there
it wouldn't have been true
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:04, Reply)

Haha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:08, Reply)

Possibly not. Would have been a lot funnier in the telling however.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:15, Reply)

^ This is the most incorrect thing on the internet, right now.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:17, Reply)

^ this is the most correct thing on the internet right now

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:19, Reply)

^ this is the internet.
RIGHT NOW.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:20, Reply)

Was. You need a new Internet.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:23, Reply)

RIGHT NOW.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:26, Reply)

RIGHT HERE.

( djtrialprice, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:32, Reply)

You bitch!

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:34, Reply)

You Slag!

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:34, Reply)

You Bitch!

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:34, Reply)

You Slag!

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:34, Reply)

TakeTHAT!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:37, Reply)

and THAT!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:37, Reply)

Hey, some people think Nicholas Parsons is funny.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 8 Mar 2010, 10:22, Reply)