you're missing the point
marriage is more than a piece of paper having 'marriage' written on it. It's an open and visible symbol of committment- sometimes an expensive one true, but always a clear symbol of the regard you feel.

If you lose such a committment, it's sad, but I can't see the harm of having had it in the past
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:00, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

I think this is my point
The commitment is what matters, the paper, the ceremony, all the rest are just symbols.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 12 May 2010, 17:02, Reply)

that doesn't always mean they aren't good things though
and having been through the process of displaying these symbols, the theory is that it will make for a stronger relationship.

That isn't necessarily the case though.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:03, Reply)

Would not dream of saying they aren't good things
merely questioning their necessity.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 12 May 2010, 17:11, Reply)

certainly not necessary
it is entirely up to the individual
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:12, Reply)

Wine isn't necessary
But it's brilliant and I hereby pledge my commitment to our relationship
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:13, Reply)

you're still missing the point
it's easy to say you have a committment. To follow that through and make a lasting acknowledgement in the form of an open/honest committment whether in a religious or civil ceremony is more of a leap
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:03, Reply)

It's true
symbols are symbols for a reason, they are physical objects that are created to represent untangible things such as emotion and in this case committment. Like when people are given Medals of Honour.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:07, Reply)

kindly stop telling me I am missing the point
I am disagreeing with you, which is not quite the same thing.Your point seems to be that my feelings are some how more valid if "make a lasting acknowledgement in the form of an open/honest [statement or display of] commitment" My contention is that the feelings involved are more important than how they are publicly expressed or solemnified.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 12 May 2010, 17:08, Reply)

I feel that you are correct in this instance.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:10, Reply)

Well, as long a b3ta's resident relation ship expert agrees with me...
How can I be wrong. :)
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 12 May 2010, 17:13, Reply)

definatly missing the point

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:11, Reply)

you are missing the point *chortle*
not really. it's more a case of debating slightly different things.

The emotions aren't more valid either way, but a marriage is more than just a piece of paper, it is an outward display of commitment to the emotions.

It's not necessary, but some people want to do it and the theory is that having some kind of commitment while make for a stronger relationship, although that is not always the case.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:11, Reply)

I claimed
you were missing the point because you kept asking why it should be written down, and I answered that 2 or 3 times
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:11, Reply)

you answered (repeatedly) by saying the piece of paper was not the point, the commitment is symbolised was
what you did not do, was explain, why the paper (or any of the rituals and legal formalities) were necessary, in addition to the commitment they symbolise.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 12 May 2010, 17:23, Reply)

It's the publicity.
All about the ME ME ME factor is marriage.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 12 May 2010, 17:24, Reply)

well, this would explain
why women are so fond of the idea
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 12 May 2010, 17:27, Reply)

Loads of men like it too
My uncle Terry for one was over the moon with all that wedding stuff.
My auntie could have taken it or left it.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:29, Reply)

your uncle Terry
is clearly a girly in disguise
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 12 May 2010, 17:31, Reply)

That has been discussed

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:33, Reply)

one of my male friends wants to get married
but his girlfriend doesn't.

In my opinion she should take what she can get.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 12 May 2010, 17:39, Reply)