It wasn't one of my life's high points, for sure.
They can't have been particularly special pants as their loss is very much overshadowed in my mind by the clear-as-day memory of my squatting in agony behind a fly-blown bin, with a stinking fountain of mustard-coloured faeces jetting in jagged spurts from my tortured anus, my baleful face fixed in misery like a Greek tragedian's mask.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 27 May 2010, 8:40, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I like your writing style
Although the story is bit grim.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 27 May 2010, 8:48, Reply)

Just a teensy bit.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 27 May 2010, 8:51, Reply)

Did you rip off your monogram first, so they could not be traced?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 27 May 2010, 8:52, Reply)

Luckily
my staff had brought my Victorian bathing machine, so not only was my modesty entirely protected throughout the whole sorry incident, but it also meant I had a handy receptacle for my soiled hand-woven Chinese silk pants, once the deed was done.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 27 May 2010, 9:00, Reply)

The poignant tragedy of the event is tempered by the elegance of your prose.

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 27 May 2010, 10:04, Reply)