Bless me Father for I have sinned. It has been 20 ish years since my last confession.
In that time I have:

lied
cheated
stolen
fought
consumed alcohol
consumed drugs
vandalised property
Punched a cow
been expelled from school
committed adultery
intenionally killed several spiders
masturbated at my desk, at work.
contributed to the downfall and eventual dismissal of a colleague just because I didn't like him.
Committed arson.

Alt Q: a slap on the wrist, given a curly wurly and told to go home and try harder.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 16 Sep 2010, 16:02, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

You cunt.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Sep 2010, 16:06, Reply)

Have you ever masturbated at your desk whilst killing a spider and punching a cow? Or were these purely separate incidents?

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 16 Sep 2010, 16:08, Reply)

Purely seperate your holiness.
Unless there was a spider on the cow and it was hurt in the process.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 16 Sep 2010, 16:11, Reply)

ok. You can have the curly wurly but you can't go home early.
This punishment is for your own good you understand.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 16 Sep 2010, 16:21, Reply)

it's ok only got 4 minutes left anyway!
In your face Jesus!!!!
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 16 Sep 2010, 16:22, Reply)

*smites*

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 16 Sep 2010, 16:23, Reply)

you punched a cow?
how was it?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 16 Sep 2010, 16:22, Reply)

17 year old BobbyChomp put everything into a punch
the cow went moooooooooooooooooooo and walked off slowly. I am a fag.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 16 Sep 2010, 16:27, Reply)

interesting
I've always wondered what it'd be like to punch livestock.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 16 Sep 2010, 16:50, Reply)