Go to work!
Being ill is no excuse for not going into the office - I make my staff come in even if they have the shits. They may as well be here feeling rough as be at home, at least here they'll earn some money.

We'll send people home if they're that bad, but having zero tolerance does mean that my staff absentee level is less than a day year each.
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:18, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Do you run a leper colony?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:26, Reply)

My staff are only allowed in if they have the shits.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:31, Reply)

Tell us that you don't check their anal apertures for signs of soreness.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:39, Reply)

I'll tell you that, if that's what you want to hear.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:41, Reply)

I'll take it that you do then.
I hope Bobby and Darth are reading this.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:45, Reply)

They're not,
because they're both in ambulances being rushed to A&E having torn their pasty little winkles off in excitement at the very thought of it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:47, Reply)

Ah, I see, a cunning plan to pretend you are a big bumder.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:49, Reply)