fuck yeah xrated
x-rated flirtini: 1 shot x, 1 shot vodka, fill champagne

alt: I just had a chinese lantern candle holder thing smashed a few weekends ago and no one said anything to me about it. The girl that did it texted my roommates sister to tell me she'd give me money but I was like whatever, it just would've been nice for you to say something

alt alt: my middle name is Lynn, gay
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:24, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

My daughter's middle name is Lynne.
I fucking hate it. It's after my ex's pikey mother Linda, whom I fucking LOATHE.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:31, Reply)

then why did you go along with it??

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:38, Reply)

I didn't.
I was informed that was what she'd been named. I'm not even on the fucking birth certificate.

Luckily her first name was agreed on whilst we were still together.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:42, Reply)

:(((((((((((((((

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:48, Reply)

the flirtini sounds amazing!!!!!!!
well done, you win the internet today.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:32, Reply)

Just change its name!
It sounds like something drunk on hen nights in Wolverhampton.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:33, Reply)

Call it 'Tart Fuel'
Much more classy.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:37, Reply)

And accurate.

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:42, Reply)

it will get you HAMMERED
along with just straight shots of x-rated
I have like 15 bottles lining a cabinet in my kitchen
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:37, Reply)

i am really chuffed you have heard of x-rated
nobody around these parts has ever seen or heard of it!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:38, Reply)

Have you heard of the other kind they make?
where the bottle glows in the dark or something? I've not had it but my friend says it's gross.

If you go to their website there's a shit ton of recipes. Their flirtini recipe is different than mine.
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:41, Reply)

aha
i shall google it before the party tomorrow.

i am liking the sound of a glow in the dark bottle, even if the contents taste like shit. would be good for pissed-up spin-the-bottle in the dark.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:44, Reply)

How old are you?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:50, Reply)

i can't believe you would ask me that question in public.
i am actually thinking about ending our affair.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:56, Reply)

The question was rhetorical, dearest.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:02, Reply)

so you're saying that
you wouldn't play spin-the-bottle in the dark with me at a party for two?

i see.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:06, Reply)

Might that not be a trifle pointless?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:17, Reply)

don't knock it til you've tried it

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:37, Reply)

48 innit?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:00, Reply)

YOU
YOU'RE ON MY LIST
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:01, Reply)

34?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:01, Reply)

FUCK OFF
NO!!!!!!!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:05, Reply)

*Thinks hard....checks profile picture*
22?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:07, Reply)

humph
better
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:11, Reply)

I know for a fact that you are at least ten years younger than I am.
I think.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:25, Reply)

you're not 40 yet, right?
then i like this
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:36, Reply)

Not quite, no...

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:37, Reply)

It sounds like Thunderbird.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:43, Reply)

oh god that stuff was awful
i'd rather lick a tramp's cheesy arsecrack than drink that ever again.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:49, Reply)

Ironically that is precisely how Thunderbird is made.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:50, Reply)

I assume you've both drunk Thunderbird
and rimmed a wino?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:50, Reply)

I have had many a fine time on Thunderbird in my youth.
By 'fine time' I mean 'spewing my ring so hard that I thought my insides were going to fall out'.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:51, Reply)

the blue stuff (13% or so) was bad enough
the red stuff (18%) was horrendous. many teenage nights were wasted and braincells killed by that nasty shit!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:56, Reply)

Oh God, yeah.
*does a little sick at the memory*
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:59, Reply)

It always tasted best when drunk down the park.*
*In fact, that is the only place I've ever drunk it.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:00, Reply)

Me too, oddly enough.
Or the Rose Gardens in Berwick.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:18, Reply)

I reckon offys were encouraged to sell it to the under 18's
Thereby putting kids off alcohol for life.

They should bring it back.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:22, Reply)

I'm sure you can still get it.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:24, Reply)

*Googles*
Apparently you can still buy it.

Along with Mad dog 20/20
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:32, Reply)

This critique sums it up nicely...
www.bumwine.com/tbird.html
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:38, Reply)

Class.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 16:42, Reply)