Ouch
I used to go out with a girl who was rather pretty, but not too bright. One afternoon after we'd had sex, I was laying there drowsily in post coital bliss, when she's grabbed the end of the condom and started stretching it. "What are you doing?" I asked.
"I'm taking it off for you." she's replied. I explained that that's not how you take off a condom, and she's said "Oh", and released it. From a stretch of about 30cm!
SNAP! Right onto the tip of my overly sensitive, just ejaculated poor cock. I've let out an almighty bellow, and she's run for the door, fearing retaliation. Of which there was none, just a half cried explanation of why that wasn't such a brilliant idea.
I still shudder when I think of that, and it happened in about 1987!
(hixy, Mon 2 Aug 2010, 0:35, 5 replies)

I don't even have a penis
And I just let out a little miniature "Aaaiiieeee" reading this.
(Marmite Omelette ...but I feel better having screamed, don't you?, Mon 2 Aug 2010, 2:03, closed)

Brilliant!
ouch though
( Major Turd for tonight only, Mon 2 Aug 2010, 3:24, closed)

i like how she knew to run
methinks shes done this before....
(Monkeystrumpet monkey. Monkey, MONKEY!!!, Mon 2 Aug 2010, 10:32, closed)

Should have let her
... it would have smacked her nose if you were lucky !
(Biff..., Mon 2 Aug 2010, 13:18, closed)

'Fearing retaliation'
I take it you're a man who knows when to raise the pimp hand in a relationship
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Mon 2 Aug 2010, 13:56, closed)