the joys of school rugby
being 6ft 1 and 18 stone of (poorly constructed, mostly out of fat) brick shit house by the age of 14, i was picked for the school rugby team. now this presented an unusual problem, in that i loved rugby and hadnt bothered to wait for the required age of 18 to sign for the local pub team.

see, school rugby here is a non contact sport, touch tackles and no pushing in the scrums, rucks and mauls are sort of a ceremonial thing without any contest. but i learned from the savages, we had 3 prison teams in our pub sunday leage and even an ex pro league player in one of them for grand theft auto (i couldnt stop the cunt, god knows how the coppers tackled him).

well, i wasnt willing to compromise. so i was generally given a red card after 11 minutes of every match (sin binned for 10 within the first, then sent off when i came back on after a smoke or 2). they still kept picking me though the daft sods, i think it was an intimidation tactic than for my playing. ill be the first to admit im shite, but i still love to play.
(nobloodinthealcoholstream, Tue 24 Nov 2009, 11:16, 11 replies)

Huh?
school rugby here is a non contact sport, touch tackles and no pushing in the scrums, rucks and mauls are sort of a ceremonial thing without any contest.

So it's rugby with out the actual rugby, then? Rugby for homeopaths.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Tue 24 Nov 2009, 11:39, closed)

Where's here?
Because the enduring, if slightly hazy, memory I have of rugby at school is that it was most definitely a contact sport and one that frequently hurt, really quite a lot.
( Moey, Tue 24 Nov 2009, 12:04, closed)

west mids
tamworth to be more precise. shitty little third rate school at the cutting edge of the health and safety blade i reckon. i should imagine any school that still allows rugby today plays touch rugby or theyd be in the courts every couple of days.
(nobloodinthealcoholstream, Wed 25 Nov 2009, 11:11, closed)

No contact Rugby?
isn't that just a game of tag?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 24 Nov 2009, 12:29, closed)

We had this version
at my old secondary, as I'm also quite a big fella (and always have been) I looked forward to Rugby until I found out it was the touch version, where instead of tackling someone you tag them.
It's basically a Tesco value version of rugby.
(Evilweevil is covered in bees, Tue 24 Nov 2009, 12:59, closed)

I am very jealous
my school practiced the normal type of rugby that usually ended up with me face down in the cold, cold mud
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 25 Nov 2009, 12:23, closed)

Yeah, touch rugby's bollocks.
It instantly cancels out the only advantage in rugby of being a fat bastard, and means you actually have to run non-stop for almost the entire games lesson.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 24 Nov 2009, 13:35, closed)

I touched rugby's bollocks once.
He didn't like it.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Tue 24 Nov 2009, 13:55, closed)

How do you not push in a scrum?
It sounds vaguely homoerotic Morris Dancing then.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Tue 24 Nov 2009, 13:54, closed)

morris dancings a bit more rough
your meant to just lean against each other and say "mornin all, lovely day". im a tighthead prop so my only real job up there is to headbut, bite, push and call them cunts as im doing it. even pro rugby has "no contest scrums", if all a teams front row are off in ambulances you cant just bung a winger in there ant tell him to do his best, hes going to break his back in minutes!
(nobloodinthealcoholstream, Wed 25 Nov 2009, 11:06, closed)

GTA
'grand theft auto?'
(Seasider, Tue 24 Nov 2009, 15:58, closed)