10)
Opinion polls.

Right, there are thousands upon thousands upon thousands of these things every month, asking the publics opinion on virtually everything ever, al the time yes? yes? yes?

Err no actually, I have never, ever, once in my life been asked to give info on these, in fact I asked around and of everyone I know nobody could recall being canvessed either, so, where the fuck are they all coming from? are there 1000 people out there employed full time providing information on these things? do they just randomly spend all day going "yes, no, yes, not sure, undivided, yes, no, no, the 4th one was the nicest,maybe in 5 years time, twice but I didn't inhale, urgh!"

You have never asked my opinion ever, therefore all opinion polls are null and void until im asked.
(Halfy By light alone, Sun 4 May 2008, 13:04, 2 replies)

I like to ruin the results
You can do this by getting a large number of people to speak to them and agreeing 100% with proposal A and also agreeing 100% with the opposite.

For example

Q) Do you think Boris Johnson will do a good job as mayor of London?

A) Yes

Q) How do you think London will benefit?

A) With that cunt Johnson in charge we're all fucked

Bit of an extreme example obviously but it's good fun to screw with the results
(magic the cat will someone please think of the kittens, Sun 4 May 2008, 13:13, closed)