doctor's receptionist
this happened to me recently:
me: "can i make an appointment to see the doctor?"
receptionist: "i can't give you an appointment unless you phone up."
me: "but i'm right here, why can't you give me an appointment?"
receptionist: "i just can't, you'll have to phone. there's a phone box outside."
me: "seriously? you're going to make me go to the phone box FIVE FEET OUTSIDE THE FRONT DOOR just to phone up for an appointment?"
receptionist: "well, i can't give you an appointment unless you do. it's been like that for ages."
me: "then why did the receptionist last week give me an appointment when i came in?"
receptionist: "i don't know! she shouldn't have! now, if you want an appointment, you'll have to phone for one."
frustrated, i walked to the phone box outside, from where i could be clearly seen by the receptionist. i inserted my coin and dialled the number.
receptionist: "hello, doctor's surgery, can i help?"
me: "yes. can i make an appointment to see the doctor, please?"
receptionist: "sorry, we've got none left. call back tomorrow."

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 15:56, 14 replies)

To be fair
it's usually because they have an automated system.
(username failed moderation, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 15:57, closed)

she's the only one who does it
irritating old cunt
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 16:02, closed)

They're always OK
Until you make even the slightest challenge to something they say.

Then the back straightens up, the hands go to the rolodex in a reflexive motion and start rifling aimlessly, at which point you realise a little black dot will appear on your registration card, and all appointments from now on will be when the doctor is running an hour late.
(username failed moderation, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 16:27, closed)

to be fair, i've never had to wait more than 20 minutes after my appointment time

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 28 Mar 2014, 14:13, closed)

irl trolling lols

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 15:58, closed)

It's the same in our surgery.
A bloke came in and asked for an appointment and was told he had to ring up. So he walked to the back of the waiting room, got his mobile out and called the receptionist. Dozy cow didn't even realise.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 27 Mar 2014, 15:58, closed)

i could have done that right in front of her and she'd have accepted it
i would have, but i had run out of credit
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 16:03, closed)

all doctors receptionists
are jobsworth petty twats drunk on power. Its a rule
(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 16:09, closed)

Only to people on the wrong side of the desk.
I've been visiting a lot of surgeries, recently, and the non-clinical staff have never been anything less than charming.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 17:22, closed)

Ok my above statement
was a sweeping generalization and my since i have moved my new doctors all seem very nice. My old doctors receptionists however were drunk on the reflected power they derived from having a little toe in the medical profession.
(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Fri 28 Mar 2014, 8:51, closed)

not all of them
the other 3 in there are fine and will happily give out appointments to people over the counter. she won't. i tend to go in because i only live 5 doors away.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 28 Mar 2014, 14:06, closed)

^ran out of pay as you go credit

( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 16:43, closed)

^Hasn't got the message that he's been outed as a serial liar and fantasist who deletes his posts once they get proven wrong without a shadow of doubt
*awaits shitty riposte about 'taking the internet too seriously'*
(The Magic Number is neither magic nor a number, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 19:03, closed)

yeah he reckons the new stamp duty rules for ltd companies holding residential properties are really going to hurt his business empire
In spite of not applying where tenants are in place. So he's making a fortune from houses bought on interest only mortgages which have no tenants. Houses worth over 500k.

An 'interesting' approach to investment.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Mar 2014, 19:39, closed)

I have had exactly this experience, apart from the fact she made me call her from my mobile while i was stood at her desk staring her in the eye.
Only to be told there were no appointments left.
( spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Thu 27 Mar 2014, 19:19, closed)

if she'd simply told me there were no appointments
i'd have phoned the next morning to get an early one.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 28 Mar 2014, 14:14, closed)