HUGE MASSIVE drugs, importartion and victoria bus station...
Quite a few years back (wobbly wavy line alert)

~~~~~~~~~~~

i'd just spent a couple of nights dossing bout the big smoke of laaandaaan town, allegedly looking for digs for my then scouse girlfriend who was allegedly goin to uni down there...
usual thing had happened - cheap bottle of voddy, obliterated, no idea where to start...decided to just go home...with accompanying obligatory multi hour wait in bus station for next bus to glasgow.

as the hangover started to kick in, it was decided enough was enough, and a wee bifter would certainly ease the pain enough to see us through...

off mr nononononono trotted to the gentleman's powder room to prepare the goods...whilst doing so it was noted doors either side of cubicle were opened/closed, opened/closed by same pair of boots...shoulda been warning enough..but no...

leaving the powder room, the rasta attendant shaking his head at me shoulda been enough of a warning...but no....

looking up the stairs to see two or three 6 footers blocking the way - that kinda gave the game away, and i immediately thought "ah shite".

come with me young man etc etc...

"kind" enough to let me tell the missus i'd been huckled and the bus that was finally approaching would be missed...that was fun.

back of the van off to wherever the hell they take you followed by the dreaded interrogation....
"where you from? what you doing here?" ... i was all but waiting for the ravetastic - "what you on?" as well...let me down on that front...bastards...

"where'd you get it then?" - i'd just like to point out that "it" was about the size of a penny, maybe 1 more decent smoke out of it, but that was it...

long tale about pubs in glasgow, never met the guy before, all the stock answers/questions i'd expect them to come across in whatever passes for cop training...

then came the killer line. the one that almost made it worthwhile.

"you've come from scotland with this filth, brought it with you - you realise we could do you with importing drugs into our country??"

I'm glad the look on my face didn't quite convey the sentiment of "fuck off you cunt" that I was thinking and they let me go.

apologies for lack of honda's and supermodels. the scouse bint was a bit of a goer though.
(NoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNo, Wed 11 May 2011, 11:03, 4 replies)

Wait, what?
You went to the bogs to make a spliff, and got hauled away as you left? Without lighting up?
How did they know what you were doing?
( IHaveABadFeelingAboutThis most likely working from home on, Wed 11 May 2011, 12:58, closed)

Would imagine construction required heating of resin
which has a distinctive smell. Green/squidgy black FTW!
(sarcastic fringehead feet of clay, buns of steel, head of lettuce, Wed 11 May 2011, 13:05, closed)

unfortunately...
...it was of a more browny, slate-like composition...and not specifically too odourous either (unfortunately).

what gave the game away apparently, was the infamous met appiled logic of me "looking the type".

cunts.
(NoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNo, Wed 11 May 2011, 15:03, closed)

Learn Dutch!
OK, I'm being flippant, but drug laws in Western Europe, parts of The Netherlands in specific circumstances aside, are fucking pathetic.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Wed 11 May 2011, 18:22, closed)