Also works for bad management...
Absolute power corrupts. Also frequently turns you into an arsehole.

My old manager told various members of the team I was in, that whilst our peers in very comparable roles were getting a pay increase to bring them in line with Industry minimums, we wouldn't as one of his bonus KPIs was keeping the budget in check and pay increases would take us over the threshold. Fortunately his boss was our old one and he got it sorted for us but it was a sign of things to come.

The time that he really took the piss and showed himself as considering to be waaaaay above us mere mortals was after a shake up at the office. The new format meant we should have had 8 "indians" plus the 1 "chief". We only had 6 +1. Two of the others were due to go on holiday/ hospital and then convalesce for a fortnight and that left us with 4 to do the work of 8. In a team meeting he asked for ideas and it was suggested that he become hands-on for a fortnight and muck in. His reply? It's imprinted on the minds on all that were in the room:

"It's like this. I'm driving a car and you are the kids in the back seat. If one of you drops something I can turn around for a second and pick it up for you. However if I have to help for more than a moment, no-one is looking where we are going and we all crash". Silence reigned. Fists were clenched and tounges bitten. What a cunt.

A week later someone who missed the previous meeting also suggested (having not heard the story) that he should help out. The cunt said "I have an analagy for that". The rest of us cut him off and told him not to bother. He used every buzzword and phrase going and just spoke bollocks half the time. The only thing he was good for was bullshit bingo - the only time I have ever played this properly.

I feel much better having vented. Thank you.

Edit: for one single letter. You know who you are. Twat.
( ForecastMonkey, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 12:44, 6 replies)

To be honest, if you can't tell the difference between a pier and a peer then you probably don't deserve a pay rise.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 12:53, closed)

Jesus ...
Why are you up there when it's so warm outside?
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 12:58, closed)

I'm sure he doesn't want to
So much qotw coursework to mark, so little time...
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 13:04, closed)

But to be fair/fare/fayre
he’s told a story rather then being a god awful sniping cunt, so it’s swings and roundabouts I ‘spose.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Wed 14 Jul 2010, 13:13, closed)

Do you think if we spend the rest of this qotw
using alternative spellings for everything and using our thesauri to the x-treme lyke Sandettie, Badger might actually ass-plode?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 13:21, closed)

I suppose it's also technically possible that all his peers are called Piers, which would work. Sort of.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 13:53, closed)

Or one peer called Piers, and he's Northern...
"Ey up, is our Piers back for is tea tonight, Pet?"
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 14:06, closed)

what a pear
of pedantic fuckers you are..
(Pat_Gash, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:15, closed)

Yes, hands up. My spelling error...
I meant peers not piers but then I am typing on a phone and trying to contribute to the QOTW. Besides discouraging others through your pedantry, just what are you bringing to the party? Judging by your posts my guess is own brand supermarket lager, which you then don't touch while helping yourself to what everyone else brought with them, criticising it as you drink it. Am I close?
( ForecastMonkey, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 22:58, closed)

2 tayke yuur analomogy won step further
he may be drinking your organic imported 6 quid a bottle cider but for some reason it says cyder on the bottle. Thats enough to ruin the night for any pedantic diarea...diahore...diare....runny poo gargler
(OTT, Thu 15 Jul 2010, 9:39, closed)

I like deliberately mispronounciating things
just to see if I get corrected.

My last score was "picture-skew" for picturesque, for which I was corrected by a noob at w**k.

That gave me wood.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 15 Jul 2010, 10:41, closed)

Hate to rain on your parade(s)
But, it's spelt "analogy" not "analagy".
(SatchmoR No, mummy, don't put knitting needles in my ears!, Thu 15 Jul 2010, 9:48, closed)

Hate to rain on your parade(s)
But, it's spelt "analogy" not "analagy".

The Badger missed that one!
(SatchmoR No, mummy, don't put knitting needles in my ears!, Thu 15 Jul 2010, 9:47, closed)

Hate to reign on your circus, but you've now posted this twice.
Pffft.

*wins*
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 15 Jul 2010, 10:39, closed)