crystal clear
whilst working in the local boozer, which happened to have a glass wall, there was a particularly inebriated old gentleman who looked as if he wasn't unaccustomed to a few afternoon ales who had to be chucked out.

he refused to vacate the establishment and when we tried to manahandle him off his seat he started swearing and with a cry of, "right then ye fuckin' cunts ah'll fuckin pish off!"
he then proceeded to march straight towards what he thought was the door but was the recently cleaned window wall. he walked straight into at full pelt burst his nose, cracked his head off a table when he fell backwards knocking himself out and shat himself.

some may think that was the funny part but it wasn't. it was watching my boss cleaning up human shit after the paramedics refused to do it and us minimum wage monkeys also followed suit.

he was forever known as faeces phil after that.
(uknowsit, Fri 6 Feb 2009, 17:32, Reply)